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Leadership

Fifteen Characteristics Of A Dysfunctional Church

Thomas F. Fischer, M.Div., M.S.A.
Number 95

1) Abusive Relationships

Abusive relationships are found when the organization (or parts of
it) seek a Scapegoat (an individual or a group) designated to suffers
pain for others or the organization. Anyone who chooses not to share in
the Scapegoating will also be scapegoated.and or face severe
consequences (e.g. rejection, blame, physical and/or emotional abuse,
censure, et al) for rejection of that role. Dysfunctional organizations
tenaciously maintain the Scapegoat role, for without it, they would be
unable to project their dysfunction on others but would have to bear the
pain of the dysfunction themselves.

2) Perfectionism

This goes beyond merely seeking excellence. Instead, it is a
controlling tactic by which individuals or groups replace a healthy
sense of trust and spontaneity with a legalistic, over-zealous,
destructive focus on minute defects of others, their leadership styles,
their procedures, the organization, et al.

Mercilessly drawing attention to otherwise irrelevant minutiae, it
directs energy from focusing on the big picture to an over-attention to
details. Bureaucracy-perpetuating constitutions, detailed bylaws, and
detailed policies and are all part of a dysfunctional organization’s
on-going prescription for aggravated conflict.as they simply provides
more ammunition for those enforcing the perfect way of operation.

3) Rigidity

Rigidity, like Perfectionism, relies on unbending rules and strict
adherence to various "objective" standards (Constitutions,
Policies, Doctrines, supposed denominational dictates, the
"right" way). The main purpose of the bureaucracy (formal or
informal) is to enforce and enlarge control over others while squashing
spontaneity and risk taking. No surprises are allowedSigmaalthough those
in or seeking control may instantaneously and repeatedly change any
dictum or direction without warning. However, hose being controlled must
do everything the "right" way.

4) Silence

People don’t speak up at appropriate times in appropriate situations
with appropriate people. Results: Repeated "unanimous"
decisions that get undermined, sabotaging supporters.

5) Repression

Unspoken rules that it is not "Christian" to express
feelings of disagreement, dissent, or anger. Instead, one must hide how
one really feels or suffer censure for expression of emotions. Instead
of expressing feelings, feelings must be hidden. Result: Repression
ultimately must be released in episodes (or series of episodes) of
uncontrollable anger and hostility.

6) Rationalization and Denial

Groups or individuals re-work truth and reality to fit their
distorted view of situations, individuals, and other groups.

7) Triangulation

Triangulation is using "go-betweens" to communicate
indirectly with other parties. Results: Unsuspecting, but sympathetic
message-bearers become entangled in an unwanted destructive web of
blame, anger, and miscommunication. Result: They become uncomfortable
with their roles and jump ship.

8) Double Messages

Such duplicity or "two-faced" aspect is exemplified by
people whose actions always have an opposite "flip side." Some
examples: "I care/get lost;" "I love you/don’t bother
me;" "I need you/You’re in my way," "Yes, I accept
you just as you are/Why don’t you change!".

9) Lack Of Fun/Anti-Spontaneity

Dysfunctional churches can’t loosen up, let go, play and have fun.
Being overly serious, humor will be seen an un- "unrighteous"
and "undignified" church activity. When play is attempted,
people get hurtSigmathe deeps wounds experienced endure for decades as
warnings to others to avoid use of fun humor. Any humor that is used is
used to hurt (e.g. "low blow", humiliation, double messages,
etc.)

10) Martyrdom

High tolerance by individuals or groups to bear abuse, pain, and
extreme sacrifice for the organization. No real atmosphere or
opportunities exist in the organization for expressing pain, loss and
providing healing mechanisms. Designated martyrs are made to feel
"deserving" of their pain.

11) Entanglement: The "Hooterville Syndrome"

This is the situation where everyone knows everyone else’s business
but the information is never accurate, relevant, timely or
constructively directed.

12) "We Care" Syndrome

An extension of the double messages mentioned above, dysfunctional
individuals and organizations will often claim to care but, when given
opportunity to assist, have other "priorities and needs" which
will cause presented needs to go unmet on a regular basis.

13) Elevations of Dysfunctional Leaders

When certain attention-seeking individuals can’t find attention in
their family, job, or elsewhere, the church becomes a convenient – and
easy – place for such "attention addicts" to get their
attention by becoming a Chairman of a congregational group. By not
saying "no" to such incompetents, the church succumbs to an
inordinate amount of incompetence, incomplete tasks, and other types of
associated narcissistic fallout.

14) Inability to Grasp a Positive Vision.

Those entrenched in perfectionism, procedures, victimization and
control will be too pre-occupied to deal with positive things such as
present and future organizational vision. Instead, there’s a
self-defeating zealous preoccupation with the past and present which
leaves no possibility for deliberating regarding the future.

15) Dysfunctional Expectations of the Pastor

The general disrespect for the Pastoral Office, testified by an
on-going succession of short-tenured pastors often indicates that either
one or both of the following dysfunctionalities are present and
operative in the given congregation.

a) Clerical Reductionism

Clerical Reductionism is when pastors are stripped of all
appropriate authority. Instead of being encouraged and supported to
carry out their ministry to the fullest appropriate extent,
dysfunctional churches minimize the expectations of the pastor.

Activities are monitored in a legalistic manner with a clear intent
to control–and limit–proper pastoral authority. Common monitored items
may include the number and types of pastoral visits, whether various
congregational policies are precisely followed by the pastor in every
respect, limiting the pastor’s "voice" in congregational
affairs including those which are specifically pastoral
responsibilities, micro-managing church office expenses, etc.

b) Clerical Expansionism

Some passive dysfunctional congregations will compensate for
their passivity by placing on the pastor the expectation to carry out
all the responsibilities and functions of the ministry single-handedly.
In these dysfunctional situations, the preacher is more than just a
preacher.

He’s the janitor, Sunday School Superintendent, Choir Director,
Chairman of boards and fellowship groups, initiator and coordinator of
every new ministry activity, and doer of everything in the church as
others passive watch and judge. Pastoral spouses often are enmeshed
unawares and/or unwillingly into this unhealthy "expansive"
view of the pastoral office.

Young upstart pastors and their spouses fresh out the seminary, as
well as pastors who start a ministry in a new location, are especially
vulnerable to dysfunctional clerical expansionism.

Of Course…

Certainly every church has some of the above dynamics to one degree
or another. However, the greater the number and intensity of the
dynamics, the greater the degree to which the church can be
characterized as "dysfunctional" and characterized by
conflict.

Resultantly, the likelihood that the church will resist changes,
pastors and their well-intended ministries, and other attempts and
programs designed to address the various dysfunctions may also increase.

What Can You Do?

If the congregation you serve shows the above characteristics, the
ministry can, at times, be a frustrating experience. However, if the
pastor is aware of the congregational dysfunctionality, he may be able
to keep his head above water and provide valuable, healthy, proactive
leadership to address these marks of dysfunctionality. Here’s a few
suggestions:

1) Recognize that the dysfunction is the congregation’s
dysfunction.

It existed long before you arrived there. It isn’t your fault. But
you may be the God’s chosen instrument to address the dysfunctionality
and bring the congregation to real healing which only God can give.

2) Know and understanding your boundaries.

Dysfunctional churches are extremely effective at projecting blame
and shame on pastors and other leaders for maintaining healthy
boundaries. Study what appropriate, healthy boundaries are and
consistently observe them.

3) Encourage your family to maintain healthy boundaries, too.

The pastor’s spouse does not necessarily have to be chairman of the
Women’s group, Youth Director, Music Director, organist, and
congregational secretary. Neither do children of the parsonage have to
be "super saints" and present at every single congregational
event.

These kinds of pastoral family involvement are often done either 1)
out of an unbridled excitement and love for the Lord and/or 2) to avoid
fear, guilt, shame and disapproval, may, in the long-term, do more harm
for the church than good. Indeed, in more cases than one may want to
admit, such involvement can be characterized as "rescue"
behaviors which perpetuate the dysfunctions.

Instead, consider using your best gifts for ministry in other than
congregational settings (e.g. denominational ministries, local social
and/or Christian ministries not directly tied to your congregation,
etc.). Remember, the ministry of Christ requires people to become
"world Christians." Isn’t that the vision you really want your
congregation to capture? Model it–to your congregation’s health!

4) Get a life…for you and your family outside the church.

Learn the joys of self-diversification and do yourself two favors.
a) Enjoying–without guilt–the many activities which God offers pastors
and their families in this world, many of which are not church-related;
and b) Solidifying a healthy base for continued mental health and
wholeness in what is sometimes a difficult ministry.

5) Continually clarify biblical teachings on the ministerial
office.

Since it may be perceived as a conflict of interest to do so
yourself, invite a trusted denominational official preach on what the
office of the ministry is, what it does, and its relationship to the
church. Clearly discuss the points you would like discussed in the
sermon (or sermon series) with the denominational official so that they
can be of maximum assistance to set forth a positive, scriptural vision
for ministry.

6) Promote the scriptural understanding of lay ministry.

Emphasize the important role of the laity in their auxiliary
ministerial capacity to work along side the pastor under his oversight.
Ephesians Five is especially good for this. Keep it simple and reinforce
the key concepts which Paul mentioned which make for a healthy Body of
Christ.

7) Intelligently practice intentional ignorance.

Sure you know how to change the light bulb. But does that mean that
the pastor should change it? Encourage lay involvement by letting it
stay dark until a lay person discovers and fills the need.

8) Put aside your perfectionist tendencies.

They’ll just make you irritable, impatient, and
frustrated.Everything doesn’t have to be done right now. There is, as
the writer of Ecclesiastes noted, a time for everything. And, one might
add, there’s a right person to do everything, too. When the right time
and the right person come together, you are on the right track to
congregational health. Wait for it. Be patient. Wait. It will come. Be
patient. There is no hurry!

9) Expect conflict.

Passive congregational members, like many adolescents, will do
anything resist responsibility, including attack the one urging the
responsibility. That’s OK. After all, didn’t St. Paul say that one
should not desire to be an overseer unless he could manage his family
well? Know you know why! But, without conflict, there is no renewal.
Expect conflict…but expect god’s promise of unparalleled renewal to
result from the experience.

10) Continually encourage people to make a positive, significant
difference for the Lord.

Besides prayer and the other nine suggestions above, this is perhaps
the most positive, ministry-impacting strategy one can use to slowly
transform and dysfunctional congregation. Share it with visitors, new
members, current leaders, and the entire congregation. Encourage them to
make a difference then let them do it–and watch the Lord put some real
"G" forces into your congregation’s ministry!

With deepest prayers to your congregation’s health!

Thomas F.Fischer

Copyright 1998–All Rights Reserved
Ministry Health Web Site
http://genesis.acu.edu/ministryhealth
Support For Your Ministry In Jesus Christ!

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