(NOMINATED for — BEST E-MAIL OF THE YEAR)
After being interviewed by the school administration, the prospective teacher said:

“Let me see if I’ve got this right. 

You want me to go into that room with all those kids, correct their disruptive behaviour, observe them for signs of abuse, monitor their dress habits, censor their T-shirt messages  and instil in them a love for learning. 

You want me to check their backpacks for weapons, wage war on drugs and sexually transmitted diseases, and raise their sense of self esteem and personal pride. 

You want me to teach them patriotism and good citizenship, sportsmanship and fair play, and how to register to vote, balance a chequebook, and apply for a job. 

You want me to check their heads for lice, recognize signs of antisocial behaviour, and ensure that they all pass their final exams.

You also want me to provide them with an equal education regardless of their handicaps, and communicate regularly with their parents in English, Arabic or any other language, by letter, telephone, newsletter, and report card. 

You want me to do all this with a piece of chalk, a blackboard, a bulletin board, a few books, a big smile, and a starting salary that qualifies me for” New Start.”

You want me to do all this, and then you tell me……

I CAN’T wear a little cross or say “Happy Christmas”  because someone might take offence? “