The Hormone Hostage knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his own hands!

This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver’s license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, or significant other!

DANGEROUS: What’s for dinner?

SAFER: Can I help you with dinner?

SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner?

DANGEROUS: Are you wearing that?

SAFER: Gee, you look good in brown.

SAFEST: WOW! Look at you!

This is MY favorite…

DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about?

SAFER: Could we be overreacting?

SAFEST: Here’s fifty dollars.

DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that?

SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left.

SAFEST: Can I get you a glass of wine with that?

DANGEROUS: What did you do all day?

SAFER: I hope you didn’t overdo it today.

SAFEST: I’ve always loved you in that robe!

Pass this on to all of your hormonal friends and those who might need a good laugh! Or men who need a warning. And remember: Money talks. Chocolate sings.