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A Sunday school teacher asked the children just before she dismissed them to go to church, “And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?”

Annie replied, “Because people are sleeping.”

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Attending a wedding for the first time, a little five-year-old girl whispered to her mother, “Why is the bride dressed in white?”

“Because white is the color of happiness, and today is the happiest day of her life.”

The child thought about this for a moment, then said, “So why is the groom wearing black?”

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A police recruit was asked during the exam, “What would you do if you had to arrest your own mother?”

He wrote as his answer, “Call for backup!”

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Smart Cat A man absolutely hated his wife’s cat and decided to get rid of him one day by driving him 20 blocks from his home and leaving him at the park.

As he was getting home, the cat was walking up the driveway.

The next day he decided to drive the cat 40 blocks away. He put the beast out and headed home.

Driving back up his driveway, there was the cat!

He kept taking the cat further and further and the cat would always beat him home. At last he decided to drive a few miles away, turn right, then left, past the bridge, then right again and another right until he reached what he thought was a safe distance from his home and left the cat there.

Hours later the man calls home to his wife: “Jen, is the cat there?”

“Yes”, the wife answers, “why do you ask?”

Frustrated, the man answered, “Put that no good feline on the phone, I’m lost and need directions!”

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A fourth-grade teacher was giving her pupils a lesson in logic.

“Here is the situation,” she said.

“A man is standing up in a boat in the middle of a river, fishing. He loses his balance, falls in, and begins splashing and yelling for help.

His wife hears the commotion, knows he can’t swim, and runs down to the bank. Why do you think she ran to the bank?”

A little girl raised her hand and asked, “To draw out all his savings?”

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Conversation overheard at the gas station between two blondes….

First blonde: “I expect they’ll be raising the gas prices again soon.”

Second blonde: “Won’t affect me. I always put in just $20 worth.”