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Humor

Christian One-Liners

“Don’t let your worries get the best of you. Remember, Moses started out as a basket case”

Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited – until you try to sit in their pews.

Many folks want to serve God, but only as advisers

It is easier to preach ten sermons than it is to live one.

The good Lord didn’t create anything without a purpose, but mosquitoes and sand gnats come close.

When you get to your wit’s end, you’ll find God lives there.

People are funny, they want the front of the bus, the middle of the road, and the back of the church.

Opportunity may knock once, but temptation bangs on your front door forever.

God Himself does not propose to judge a man until he is dead. So why should you?

Some minds are like concrete, thoroughly mixed up and permanently set.

I don’t know why some people change churches; what difference does it make which one you stay home from?

A lot of church members who are singing “Standing on the Promises” are just sitting on the premises.

We were called to be witnesses, not lawyers or judges

Be ye fishers of men. You catch them – He’ll clean them.

Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous.

God loves everyone, but probably prefers “fruits of the spirit” over “religious nuts!”

God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage.

He who angers you, controls you!

Prayer: Don’t give God instructions — just report for duty!

We don’t change the message, the message changes us.

You can tell how big a person is by what it takes to discourage him.

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