Some quotes from the best book on prayer I’ve read for a long time – Richard Rohr’s ‘Everything Belongs: The Gift of Contemplative Prayer’:

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‘Lawrence Kohlberg wrote some excellent material on levels of moral development… Jesus… is a sixth-level person. Many people have not done their first-, second- and third-level work… They’re really not bad-willed; they just can’t understand a higher, more complex moral understanding…

‘Our first response to anyone calling us to truth, greatness, goodness or morality at a higher level will be *increased anxiety*. We don’t say “Isn’t this wonderful.” Instead we recoil in terror and say, “I don’t know if I want to go there.” At the edges of medieval maps was frequently penciled the warning: “Here be dragons”. We approach these dragons when we approach the edge of our comfort level. “He must be wrong. That’s not true”. That’s our usual response when we’re called to a higher level…

‘The most distressing letters I get are from people who feel they must put you back in *their* box. They try to dismiss or shame anyone calling them out of their comfort zone. For if you are right, they think they might have to change or admit they are wrong. But of course they’re still thinking egocentrically in terms of right/wrong and win/lose… How wonderful if we are free to say, “Could 10 percent of what she is saying perhaps be true?” That would be a win/win situation…’ (pp. 111-113).

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So, the markers include the following:

1. At the higher levels we are able with Jesus to love our enemies, and express that. At lower levels that is too hard: they must be demonized.

2. At the higher levels we can separate wheat from chaff. At lower levels it’s all one or the other. For example, if the person we’ve demonized has something worthwhile to say on a given topic, that ‘good’ will be ignored or misconstrued: the demonized person is all black; I the demonizer, am all white.

3. A key indicator of moral/spiritual maturity is how often a person can say ‘I was wrong/ I apologize/ I’ll change/ I want to be teachable’… (Google is your friend here 🙂

4. Usually silence is golden in the context of lower-maturity levels; until their crisis comes, those dear people are not teachable.

Which is why all the great spiritual masters teach us that emotional and spiritual maturity only come through sincere prayer and occasions of suffering: in both these situations we are vulnerable and dependent on God.

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Shalom! Rowland Croucher