I recall the story of Pat and Mick (two Lithuanians, so we don’t become racist) who lost their jobs and went to Centrelink. They filled out their work histories and took them to the counter, where the man told Mick he would have to come back in two days.

“But wait here Pat!” he said, and he was back in no time with a swag of vacancy cards.

When Mick protested about being overlooked, the counter attendant explained: “Mick, you are a factory hand, but Pat here is a diesel fitter!”

“Rubbish!” exclaimed Mick, “We worked side by side on the inspection line in a panty hose factory.

All Pat did was to hold up each pair and say; ‘Dese’ll fit ‘er!’