A GOOD PUN IS ITS OWN RE-WORD

1 Energizer Bunny arrested – charged with battery.

2 A pessimist’s blood type is always b-negative.

3 Practice safe eating – always use condiments.

4 A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother

5 Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death.

6 I used to work in a blanket factory, but it folded.

7 Corduroy pillows are making headlines.

8 Is a book on voyeurism a peeping tome?

9 Sea captains don’t like crew cuts.

10 A successful diet is the triumph of mind over platter.

11 A gossip is someone with a great sense of rumor.

12 Without geometry, life is pointless.

13 When you dream in color, it’s a pigment of your imagination.

14 Reading while sunbathing makes you well-red.

15 A backwards poet writes inverse.

16 If you don’t pay your exorcist, you get repossessed.

17 With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.

18 The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.

19 A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.

20 You feel stuck with your debt if you can’t budge it.

21 He often broke into song because he couldn’t find the key.

22 He had a photographic memory that was never developed.

23 When an actress saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she’d dye.