(1) They say the ideal marriage is that between a deaf husband and a dumb wife (Which does seem like overkill)

(2) A man was sitting on a river bank fishing when a loony popped his head over the high wall of the asylum just behind him –

Loony: “What are you doing?”

Man: “I’m fishing.”

Loony: “How long have you been there?”

Man: “Six hours.”

Loony: “Caught anything yet?”

Man: “No.”

Loony: “Come inside.”