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Prayer

Dog’s prayers

On August 18, 2011 ⋅ Post a comment

I copied and pasted from an email a bunch of beautiful photos of dogs, with their prayers. I still haven’t figured out how to show the pictures here, but here are the prayers:

 

 

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Dear God..

 

Dear God: Is it on purpose our names are the same, only reversed?

 

Dear God: Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another?

 

Dear God: When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it still the same old story?

 

Dear God: Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray,

and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a Dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around?

We do love a nice ride! Would it be so hard to rename the ‘Chrysler Eagle’ the ‘Chrysler Beagle’?

 

Dear God: If a Dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, is he still a bad Dog?

 

Dear God: We Dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers,

beepers, scent ID’s, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths.

What do humans understand?

 

Dear God:   More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.

 

Dear God: Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize?

 

Dear God:   Let me give you a list of just some of the things I must remember to be a good Dog.

 

1. I will not eat the cats’ food before they eat it or after they throw it up.

2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way they smell.

3. The Litter Box is not a cookie jar.

4. The sofa is not a ‘face towel’.

5. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.

6. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad’s underwear when he’s on the toilet.

7.   Sticking my nose into someone’s crotch is an unacceptable way of saying ‘hello’.

8. I don’t need to suddenly stand straight up when I’m under the coffee table

9. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house – not after.

10. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt across the carpet.

11. I will not sit in the middle of the living room and lick my crotch.

12. The cat is not a ‘squeaky toy’ so when I play with him and he makes that noise,

it’s usually not a good thing.

 

 

 

P.S.   Dear God: When I get to Heaven.  may I have my testicles back?

—

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dear God
 

Dear God: Is it on purpose our names are the same, only reversed?
 

Dear God: Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another?
 

Dear God: When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it still the same old
story?
 

Dear God: Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang,
the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a Dog?
How often do you see a cougar riding around?
We do love a nice ride! Would it be so hard to rename the ‘Chrysler Eagle’ the
‘Chrysler Beagle’?
 

Dear God: If a Dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, is
he still a bad Dog?
 

Dear God: We Dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals,
whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID’s, electromagnetic energy fields, and
Frisbee flight paths.
What do humans understand? 

 

Dear God:   More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.
 

Dear God: Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize?
 

Dear God:   Let me give you a list of just some of the things I must remember to be a
good Dog.
1. I will not eat the cats’ food before they eat it or after they throw it up. 

2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way they smell. 

3. The Litter Box is not a cookie jar. 

4. The sofa is not a ‘face towel’. 

5. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff. 

6. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad’s underwear when he’s on the toilet. 

7.   Sticking my nose into someone’s crotch is an unacceptable way of saying ‘hello’. 

8. I don’t need to suddenly stand straight up when I’m under the coffee table 

9. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house – not after. 

10. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt across the carpet. 

11. I will not sit in the middle of the living room and lick my crotch. 

12. The cat is not a ‘squeaky toy’ so when I play with him and he makes that noise, 

it’s usually not a good thing.
 

P.S.   Dear God: When I get to Heaven, may I have my testicles back?

 

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