Sometime when I teach a Bible study, I occasionally have a heckler or two in the audience. I don’t mean the funny guys in the balcony on the Muppets Show – those guys are hilarious. They laugh with you, not at your expense. What I mean is people who have an “axe to grind,” people who are present only to make their point. You know, like the ones who show up on cable news talk shows most of the time.

I’m sure I have been in their seat somewhere in my past life experience. I’m sure there were times when I thought I knew more than anybody else. So maybe this is “what you sow when you’re 15 you will reap when you’re 53” kind of thing.

Or maybe I just I haven’t yet learned the art of deep listening to the extent that the following quote describes. It is a challenge to me to think about setting my own ego aside and listening to those who refuse to listen to me.

Of course, Jesus had hecklers, too. Not that I am confusing myself with Jesus, but he is the guy I seek to learn from more than from anyone else. How did he deal with the Pharisees, Sadducees, scribes, and others who had their own agenda? I don’t think he had a “one size fits all” response. I do know that at least once, when he was speaking with the “rich young ruler” he saw the man with eyes of love and was sad that the man turned away. Perhaps that is what deep listening is all about – seeing and hearing the other with the eyes of love. There are certainly people I know and work with who have that ability. It is one of the most important skills in the world, and perhaps it takes nearly a lifetime to begin to practice well.

Here’s the quote:  ¢â‚¬Å“The most important thing is that we need to be understood. We need someone to be able to listen to us and to understand us, then we will suffer less, but everyone is suffering, and no one wants to listen. We don ¢â‚¬â„¢t know how to express ourselves so that people can understand, because we suffer so much, the way we express our pain hurts other people, and they don ¢â‚¬â„¢t want to listen.

Listening is a very deep practice ¢â‚¬ ¦. You have to empty yourself. You have to leave space in order to listen ¢â‚¬ ¦. especially to people we think are our enemies  ¢â‚¬“ the ones we believe are making our situation worse. When you have shown your capacity for listening and understanding, the other person will begin to listen to you, and you have a chance to tell him or her of your pain, and it ¢â‚¬â„¢s your turn to be healed.  ¢â‚¬  -Thich Nhat Hanh

So today, when someone challenges your ego ground, take it with a smile and a grain of salt. Remember those times when you would nearly staked your life on your own unexamined opinions. Then look at the offending brother or sister with eyes of compassion and empathy, knowing that if they are just disagreeable souls, there’s a good chance that when they were young they were not listened to, were not valued with unconditional love, and so they have yet to cross that bridge and will never cross that bridge without someone overwhelming them with kindness and love. Take a deep breath. A really deep breath. Count to ten. Or a hundred. And imagine the offending person as an abused, neglected or hurt child, with some significant adult treating them, at a very young age, the same way they are treating you right now. Jesus just might show up.