Train up a child in the way he should go, even when he is old he
will not depart from it (Proverbs 22:6).

Your primary responsibility as a parent is to lead your child to
Christ and help him establish his identity in Christ. When a child comes
into the world, he is completely dependent on his earthly parents to
feed him, change his dirty diapers and provide shelter. Childhood and
adolescence is the process of moving from total dependence as a child to
total independence as an adult. In the process of finding out who they
are as individuals, children gradually move away from many of the
people, thoughts, and ideas they have experienced through their parents
and move toward the people, thoughts, and ideas which they have made
their own.

A child is capable of understanding God’s love and protection and
receiving Jesus Christ as Savior at a very early age. But understanding
his spiritual identity is a process that takes place over the years of
his childhood. It is the process of shifting his dependence from parents
to God.

Children wrestle with identity around age 12. Researchers of
cognitive development say that most 12-year-olds can think as adults.
They are capable of abstract thinking and understanding symbolism. This
is significant when you remember that Jesus appeared out of obscurity at
age 12. Furthermore, the Jewish bar mitzvah has been celebrated for
centuries when a boy turns 12, the age at which Jews believe that a boy
becomes a man. Many churches have confirmation for children at or near
the age of 12.

I believe age 12 is the approximate time in a child’s life when we
should help him establish his spiritual identity. Evangelicals have
tended to minimize junior high ministry and focus on high school. High
school is too late for some kids to be challenged with their spiritual
identity. Don’t make that mistake with your children. You must begin
early helping them understand who they are as children of God and what
their identity means to them spiritually. Seeing themselves as God sees
them is the most important perception your children will ever have. If
your kids don’t find their identity in Christ, they will find it in the
world.

Help me guide my children into a relationship with You, dear Father,
so they may establish their identity in Christ.