Siblings, married 217 years, say good marriage worth the effort

By Dana Williamson

ELK CITY, Okla. (BP)–A good marriage does not come easy, but it’s worth the
effort.

It takes commitment. It takes marrying the right person. It takes hard work.
It takes contentment. It takes communication.

These words of wisdom come from four couples who have been married a total of
217 years — and they happen to include brothers and sisters from the same
family.

Marvin, Minnie, Russell and Johnnie Hall grew up in western Oklahoma, and
that is where they all met their lifetime mates. Three of the siblings still live
within a few miles of each other in Elk City and near Sayre.

Marvin Hall, who served 20 years with the Baptist Foundation of Oklahoma, now
lives in Oklahoma City with his wife of 58 years, Lois.

The oldest of the children, Marvin, 79, married May 25, 1940. He met Lois
when she was teaching school at Berlin. It seems he went to see his girlfriend,
Dorothy, who introduced him to the new teacher in the community, who just
happened to be living with the girlfriend’s family. It was goodbye Dorothy, hello
Lois as the two were married a few months later in Lois’ home in Brinkman.

They moved to Cheyenne where she taught school and Marvin farmed. He later
worked in the grocery business in Berlin and Sayre and bought a grocery store in
Dill City. It was while he was living in Dill City that he was called to preach.
He served churches in Lone Oak, Norman, Shawnee and Bartlesville before joining
the foundation staff in 1965. He and Lois are presently members of Portland
Avenue Baptist Church, Oklahoma City.

Minnie, 75, married C.R. Tucker June 6, 1941. Tucker said he met Minnie after
the older brother of the girl he was dating told him he didn’t want him to marry
his sister.

“He told me there were some good-looking girls in Berlin,” Tucker remembered.

The brother was right, and at age 22, Tucker, who became a preacher, married
Minnie, who was 18.

Tucker has been pastor of churches in Retrop, Foss, Newcastle, Granite,
Sweetwater, Elk City and Vici, Okla., retiring in 1993. During their marriage,
Minnie worked in a grocery store and dress shop. They are now members of First
Baptist Church, Elk City.

Younger brother Russell, 73, met his future wife, Louise, at the age of six
months when both were placed on a pallet at Belmont Baptist Church (now
disbanded). Nineteen years later, on Feb. 14, 1945, they were married. Members of
First Baptist Church, Sayre, he is a farmer, rancher and auctioneer, sells real
estate and personal property, and she worked in a Sayre bank for 10 years.

The baby of the family, Johnnie, 66, was only 16 when she married James Lee
Bill Womack June 18, 1948. Womack is retired from the U.S. Post Office and now
helps Johnnie run her specialty bake shop out of their home. They are also
members of First Baptist, Elk City.

Among the couples are 12 children (one deceased), 21 grandchildren and 17
great-grandchildren.

The couples’ opinions on why all of their marriages have lasted so long are
varied, but similar.

“You have to love God and your wife,” said Russell. “You also have to work
hard and enjoy what you have.”

Bill agreed with Russell. “Kids today have it pretty easy,” he noted. “They
want to start out where mom and dad are. They get overextended, the bill
collectors come, and they just walk out.”

“Money is a factor,” echoed Marvin. “Kids today go out and buy and get
over-obligated,” he pointed out. “I trust Lois to spend money. She knows how much
we have and won’t overspend.”

Minnie and Louise both believe it helps to pick the right mate in the first
place.

“It was my choice to marry a Christian,” Minnie said. “I wanted someone who
knew the Lord, and someone I could love and depend on.”

“It was my intention to have a one-woman relationship for a lifetime,” said
C.R.

Johnnie said when she got married, even society determined it was for life.

“No matter how hard things got, you didn’t divorce,” she said. “Now society
accepts divorce.”

“You have to forget the idea that if the marriage doesn’t work, you can get a
divorce,” said Russell.

He added his parents started the children off right.

“We were raised in a time when we all worked and didn’t have money,” Russell
said. “I give a lot of credit to my upbringing.”

All the couples agreed marriage involves a lot of give and take.

“You have to give a lot in a marriage,” stated Johnnie.

Marvin emphasized marriage is not a 50-50 proposition. “It takes 100 percent
on the part of both husband and wife,” he said. “Couples today are not willing to
submit to one another. They don’t communicate. They want their own way. We’ve
always been willing to do each other’s jobs. Lois has always been a worker and
carried more than half the load. She’s been a support to me.”

Minnie noted there is a definite lack of commitment today.

“Our parents’ commitment was the main thing that influenced us,” said Minnie,
whose parents were married 40 years before her mother’s death at age 62.

Another important aspect of marriage, it would seem, is a sense of humor
which the Hall siblings display.

“When we married, we decided Lois would take care of all the small problems
and I’d handle the big ones,” said Marvin. “So far we haven’t had any big ones.”

“When we fuss, one of us goes outside,” responded Lois. “Marvin says outside
life has been good for him.”

[Baptist Press 6 Feb ’99]