PAIRS Relationship Revival/Survival Tips

Most of us want to be in love, and to make our loving relationships lasting and fulfilling.

Here are 14 tips developed by the Falls Church, Virginia-based PAIRS Foundation which can help your relationship today, and everyday. We hope you’ll share these tips with your partner.

First, foremost and always – Learn to listen. Listen to yourself as well as your partner. Actions speak louder then words. Your non-verbal communication says volumes and could easily be misread. Be aware of your body language. Test all you assumptions verbally. No matter how “obvious” it is to you and how ‘certain’ you are of your partner’s views, check it out. Ask and listen for intent. Recognize when your communication is creating more of a problem than the problem itself. Accentuate the positive. Appreciate one thing about the other daily – say so verbally. Keep your partner informed of your concerns – about work, home, family. Don’t go to bed angry – talk it out. Monitor a potentially irritating, angry tone of voice that can turn a discussion into an argument. Don’t preach or lecture. Use tact and timing. Pick mutually agreeable times to have important conversations. Forgive – don’t hold a grudge. Bond – Affection and physical closeness help emotional openness. Hold hands, kiss in public, call at work just to say you love your partner, hug in elevators; sex should never be your only avenue to closeness. Try it. Play – take time to do things you love – together. Give each other a coupon book with 14 items you know your partner likes to do and fill in the dates to do them together. Make time to do all of the above. Time and sharing is life.

PAIRS is professionally-guided training in how to sustain intimacy in relationships. It is a comprehensive program in which couples and singles learn the necessary skills to maintain satisfying, healthy relationships. PAIRS courses are available in major cities throughout the United States and much of the world. For further information or a printed copy of these thought-starting tips, call 1-800- IS-PAIRS, or write

PAIRS Foundation Ltd., 3705 South George Mason Drive, Falls Church, VA 22041.