Seen on a T-Shirt: If I Had Known Being a Grandparent Was So Much Fun, I Would Have Done It First

My granddaughter came to spend a few weeks with me, and I decided to teach her to sew. After I had gone through a lengthy explanation of how to thread the machine, she stepped back, put her hands on her hips, and said in disbelief, “You mean you can do all that, but you can’t operate my Game Boy?”

My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, “Granma, do you know how you and God are alike?” I mentally polished my halo while I asked, “No, how are we alike?” “You’re both old,” he replied.

I didn’t know if my granddaughter has learned her colors yet, so I decided to test her. I would point out something and ask her what color it was. She would tell me and always she was correct. But it was fun for me, so I continued. At last she headed for the door, saying sagely, “Grandma, I think you should try to figure out some of these yourself.”

A ten-year-old, under the tutelage of her grandmother, was becoming quite knowledgeable about the Bible. Then one day she floored her grandmother by asking, “Which Virgin was the mother of Jesus: the Virgin Mary or the King James Virgin?”

A grandmother was telling her little granddaughter what her own childhood was like: “We used to skate outside on a pond. I had a swing made from a tire; it hung from a tree in our front yard. We rode our pony. We picked wild raspberries in the woods.” The little girl was wide-eyed, taking this in. At last she said, “I sure wish I’d gotten to know you sooner!”

Grandparents are the ones who always love you and never yell at you no matter how many dumb things you do. – Edward, age 10

Have children while you parents are still young enough to take care of hem. – Rita Rudner

Never have children, only grandchildren. ~Gore Vidal~

Few things are more delightful than grandchildren fighting over your lap. ~Doug Larson~

No cowboy was ever faster on the draw than a grandparent pulling a baby picture out of a wallet. ~Author Unknown~