One day, this guy is sitting in this bar taking his merry time. All of a sudden he’s startled by three blondes giving cheers, saying, “Fifteen! Fifteen!” He just ignores them and continues to drink.

About 5 minutes later, the blondes again say, “Fifteen! Fifteen!”

At this, the guy then walks over and asks them why they keep saying, “Fifteen! Fifteen!”

The blondes respond, “Well, we went to the supermarket and bought this jigsaw puzzle, which we put together in 15 weeks! Considering that on the side of the box it said 3-5 years.”

…..

A blonde was complaining to her friend about constantly being called a dumb blonde. Her friend tells her “go do something to prove them wrong! Why don’t you learn all the state capitals or something?” The blonde thinks this is a great idea, and locks herself up for two weeks studying.

The next party she goes to, some guy is making dumb blonde comments to her. She gets all indignant and claims, “I’m NOT a dumb blonde. In fact, I can name ALL the state capitals!”

The guy doesn’t believe her, so she dares him to test her. He says “Okay, what’s the Capital of Montana?”

The blonde tosses her hair in triumph and says, “That’s easy! It’s M!”

…..

My father was in the dentist’s chair having a root canal done. Every so often, the dentist would stick a large toothpick-like object into the tooth’s canal to see how far he had drilled. Each time, this thing caused my father great pain, but whenever he complained, the dentist replied, “Oh, that doesn’t hurt — it’s just a measuring device.

This happened a couple more times. Again my father complained — again he got the same response. Finally my father sat up in the chair, took all the stuff out of his mouth and looked straight at the dentist.

“Excuse me for a moment,” Dad said. “I have to go out to my truck, get my tape measure and whack you in the head with it. It shouldn’t hurt, though. It’s just a measuring device.”