---

* Favorite Food

Dogs: kibbles

Computers: bits

* Method used to end undesirable behavior

Dogs: hit with rolled up newspaper

Computers: hit control-alt-delete

* After destruction of personal property

D: dog not found

C: file not found

* Favorite trick

D: roll over

C: play dead

* Comic-page hero

D: Dogbert

C: Dilbert

* Fun way to mess with their heads

D: peanut butter on roof of mouth

C: peanut butter in CD-ROM drive

* Consequence of virus

D: replace valuable carpeting

C: replace valuable data

* Widely ignored government mandate

D: leash law

C: Communications Decency Act

* Waste disposal tool

D: pooper-scooper

C: uninstaller (necessary only on Win-tel machines!)

* Sensitive internal procedures

D: must be undertaken by fully qualified professional

C: may be undertaken by that guy at work who fixed

“one kind-of like this” once

* Method of marking territory

D: lifting leg

C: “Designed for Windows 95”

* Unique behavior

D: lick and drag

C: click-and-drag

* Inexplicable physical feature

D: dewclaw

C: scroll lock key

* Estimated lifespan

D: 12 years

C: 12 months

* At end of useful life

D: euthanasia

C: tax deduction

Well, you dog lovers out there (I already know you’re a computer lover, or you wouldn’t be reading this!) will relate to these. If you can think of additions, send them to and I’ll add them in.

~~~ If you’re looking for professional & experienced computer consultants, let me recommend ESB Consultancy: http://www.gold.net.au/~esb/ – Their capabilities are quite impressive. Family operated since 1987.~~~

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