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Humor

21st Century 23rd Psalm

In these days of increasing sophistication in our language, and
jargon which overflows into almost every area of our lives, we feel sure
that by the year 2000 a new millennium version of the Bible will have
been produced incorporating much of this modern language – perhaps it
will be called the NMV New Millennium Version. and the 23rd Psalm could
never be the same again – It may sound something like this…

The Lord and I are in a shepherd – sheep situation, and I am in a
position of negative need

He prostrates me in a green belt grazing area, and conducts me
directionally parallel to a non-torrential aqueous liquid.

He restores to original satisfaction levels my psychological make
up.

Notwithstanding the fact that I make ambulatory progress through the
non-illuminated inter-hill mortality slot.. terror sensations shall not
be observed within me due to the proximity of the omnipotence.

Your pastoral walking aid and quadruped pickup unit introduce me
into a pleasurific mood state.

You design and produce a nutrient bearing furniture type structure
in the context of non-cooperative elements, and my beverage utensil
experiences a volume crisis.

You enact ahead related folk ritual utilising vegetable extracts.

Surely it must be an ongoing non-deductible fact that your
inter-relational, emphatical and non-vengeful capacities will pursue me
as their target focus for the duration of this non death period.

And I will possess tenant rights in the housing unit of the Lord on
a permanently open ended time basis.

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