Helium was up, feathers were down. Paper was stationary.
Fluorescent tubing was dimmed in light trading.
Knives were up
sharply.
Cows steered into a bull market.
Pencils lost a few
points.
Hiking equipment was trailing.
Elevators rose, while
escalators continued their slow decline.
Weights were up in heavy
trading.
Light switches were off.
Mining equipment hit rock
bottom.
Diapers remain unchanged.
Shipping lines stayed at an
even keel.
The market for raisins dried up.
Coca Cola
fizzled.
Caterpillar stock inched up a bit.
Sun peaked at
midday.
Balloon prices were inflated.
Scott Tissue touched a new
bottom.
And batteries exploded in an attempt to recharge the market.