In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed, here are
some actual label instructions on consumer goods:

* On Sears hair dryer:
Do not use while sleeping.

* On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.

* On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.

* Some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.

* On a hotel-provided shower cap in a box:
Fits one head.

* On Tesco’s Tiramisu desert:
Do not turn upside down. (Printed on the bottom of the box.)

* On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating

* On packaging for a Rowenta Iron:
Do not iron clothes on body

* On Boot’s CHILDREN’s Cough Medicine
Do not drive car or operate machinery

* On Nytol (a sleep aid):
Warning: may cause drowsiness

* On a kitchen knife:
Warning: Keep out of children.

* On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.

* On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.

* On Sainsbury’s Peanuts
Warning: contains nuts

* On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.

* On a chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.