Photons have mass!!?? I didn’t even know they were Catholic…

A diagnostic is someone who doesn’t know whether there are two gods.

As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools.

Televangelists: The Pro Wrestlers of religion.

On an atheist’s tombstone: Here lies an atheist; all dressed up and no place
to go.

Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere may be happy.

I am an agnostic pagan. I doubt the existence of many gods.

A dyslexic, agnostic insomniac – one who lies awake at night wondering if
there really is a dog…

All God’s giants have been weak men who did great things for God because they
reckoned on His being with them.

The Scriptures are shallow enough for a babe to come and drink without fear
of drowning and deep enough for theologians to swim in without ever reaching the
bottom. – St. Jerome

There are two kinds of people: those who say to God, “Thy will be done,” and
those to whom God says, “All right, then, have it your way.” – C.S. Lewis

Make G-d laug – plan for the future.

“I am ready to meet my maker. Whether or not my maker is prepared for the
great ordeal of meeting me is another matter.” – Winston Churchill

A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar. The bartender says, “What
is this, some kind of joke?”

Adam to Eve: I’ll wear the plants in this family!

Atheist achieving orgasm: “Oh Random! Oh, Chance!”

Catholic: Can’t stop bringing cats home.

Jesus Saves… Passes to Moses. Shoots… He SCORES!

That was Zen; this is Tao.

Religion is for those who fear hell, Spirituality is for those who have been
there…

Sometimes we turn to God when our foundations are shaking, only to find out
it is God who is shaking them

Sects, sects, sects. Is that all you monks ever think about?