A top movie producer was discussing his new project, an action docudrama about famous
composers with several top stars. Stallone, Schwartzenegger and Van Damme were present.
The producers really desired the box office ‘oomph’ of these three, so they were prepared
to allow them to select what famous composers they would portray.

"Well," started Stallone, "I’ve always admired Mozart. I would love to
play him."

"Chopin has always been my favorite," said Van Damme, "I’ll play
him."

The producers were pleased. "Sounds splendid. But who do you want to be,
Arnold?"

"I’ll be Bach."