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Humor

New Definitions

The Washington Post’s "Style Invitational" asks readers to take any word from
the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new
definition. Here are some recent winners:

Fortissimoe: the musical moment produced when someone serially slaps the faces of the
first-violin section.

Tatyr: a lecherous Mr. Potato Head.

Doltergeist: a spirit that decides to haunt someplace stupid, such as your septic tank.

Giraffiti: vandalism spray-painted very, very high, such as the famous "Surrender
Dorothy" on the Beltway overpass.

Sarchasm: the gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the recipient who doesn’t
get it.

Contratemps: the resentment permanent workers feel toward the fill-in workers.

Whitetater: a political hot potato.

Reintarnation: coming back to life as a hillbilly.

Inoculatte: to take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

Hipatitis: terminal coolness.

Taterfamilias: the head of the Potato Head family.

Guillozine: a magazine for executioners.

Suckotash: a dish consisting of corn, lima beans and tofu.

Burglesque: a poorly planned break-in. (See: Watergate)

Karmageddon: It’s like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes,
right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it’s like a serious bummer.

Glibido: all talk and no action.

Antifun gal: a prude.

Vaseball: a game of catch played by children in the living room.

Deifenestration: to throw all talk of God out the window.

Hozone: the area around 14th street.

Acme: a generic skin disease.

Dopeler effect: the tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you
rapidly.

Hindprint: indentation made by a couch potato.

Intaxication: euphoria at getting a refund from the IRS, which lasts until you realize
it was your money to start with.

Newtspaper: the Washington Times.

Nazigator: an overbearing member of your carpool.

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