Q: Are you in the top half of your class? A: No, I’m one of the students who make the top half possible! Art Teacher: The picture of the horse is good, but where is the wagon? Pupil: The horse will draw it! Teacher: Why are you picking your nose in class? Pupil: My mother won’t let me do it at home!

Teacher : Why are you reading the last pages of your history book first? Pupil: I want to know how it ends!

Teacher: If you have five haystacks in one corner, five in another and two in another, how many would you have? Pupil: One big haystack!

Teacher: Does anyone know who broke the sound barrier? Pupil: I’m no squealer!

Teacher: Do you file your nails Billy? Billy: No, I just throw them away!

Teacher: Billie, stop your day dreaming? Billie: I wasn’t day dreaming, I was taking a nap!

Teacher: What can we do to stop polluting our waters? Pupil: Stop taking baths?

Teacher : Can’t you retain anything in your head overnight? Pupil : Of course, I’ve had this cold in my head for two days!