When Reality Sets In

1. Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about

your age and start bragging about it.

2. Don’t let anyone tell you you’re getting old. Squash their

toes with your rocker.

3. The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line

for.

4. Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me. I want people to

know why I look this way. I’ve traveled a long way and some of the roads

weren’t paved.

5. Maturity means being emotionally and mentally healthy. It is

that time when you know when to say yes and when to say no,

and when to say WHOOPEE!

6. How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are?

7. When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth,

think of Algebra.

8. You know you are getting old when everything either dries up

or leaks.

9. I don’t know how I got over the hill without getting to the

top.

10. The golden years are really just metallic years, gold in the

tooth, silver in your hair, and lead in the rear.

11. Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at

the age of 80 and gradually approach 18.

12. One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that

it is such a nice change from being young. One must wait

until evening to see how splendid the day has been.

13. Age seldom arrives smoothly or quickly. It is more often a

succession of jerks.

14. Yeah, being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.

15. Old age is when former classmates are so gray and wrinkled,

and blind they don’t recognize you.

16. If you don’t learn to laugh at trouble, you won’t have

anything to laugh at when you are old.

I’m a walking storeroom of facts…..I’ve just lost the key to the

storeroom.