Only in America… can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

Only in America do people order double cheese burgers, a large fries and a diet coke.

Only in America are there handicapped parking places in front of a skating rink.

Only in America do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters.

Only in America do people leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway, and leave useless things and junk in boxes locked in the garage.

Only in America do people use answering machines to screen calls and have call waiting so they won`t miss a call from someone they didn`t want to talk to in the first place.

Only in America do they buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

Only in America do they use the word “politics” to describe the process so well: “Poli” in latin meaning “many” and “tics” meaning “blood sucking creatures”.

Only in America people use a ride-on mower to cut the garden, and after the job is done, they go into the house to work out on exercise machines.

Only in America the poorest people are the fattest people.