Ministry Health
How To Deal With Dr. Jekyl–Mr. Hyde In Your
Church
Thomas F. Fischer, M.Div., M.S.A.
Number 81

Those “Two-Faced” People

We’ve all seen and experienced them. In our less
"professional" moments, perhaps we might have justly or
unjustly lashed out at those whom we perceived to be two-faced,
hypocritical, skin-deep "wolves in sheep’s clothing" who, we
feel, are just Judas’s in disguise putting on a "show" or
facade.

Whatever we call these types of people, perhaps the greatest thing
that characterizes our reaction is, "How can they be so
different?" "What made them change?" "What a fickle
person!" and/or "I never expected that from them!"

We All Are A Jekyl And Hyde

Discounting, of course, more serious mental disorders such as
Multiple Personality Disorder (MPD), now more commonly referred to as
Disassociative Identity Disorder (DID), virtually all of us have a
"Jekyl and Hyde" aspect to our personalities.

A number of personality inventories recognize and test for this
aspect of our personalities, among them the Personal Personality Profile
(from Performax Systems). What these inventories recognize is that we
generally have two preferred personality modes, a
"non-anxious" and an "anxious mode."

Non-Anxious And Anxious Modes

The non-anxious mode refers to our personality characteristics when
we are not under stress. It is this mode we use when we are not under
pressure. It’s the mode which we use when we’re with others. It’s the
mode that we most often use when we’re in the company of others. Above
all, the behaviors demonstrated in the non-anxious mode are generally
those behaviors which we would like to have others believe characterize
us.

The anxious mode of behavior, however, refers to those behaviors
with which we instinctively use to react to crises or anxiety-provoking
events. When it’s "do or die," these are the behaviors that we
prefer to draw on…whether they are healthy and constructive or not.
Anxious behaviors tend to be instinctive. Behaviors in this mode may be
made without regard to what others think, what they say, what is right,
what is wrong, or what consequences may result from anxious reactions.or
.

Stress Shifts

Anxious behaviors may be rather frightfully surprising. Indeed, they
often can catch us "off guard." Yet, though their timing and
manner of behavior may be unpredictable, the fact that there is a stress
shift ought not surprise us. After all, it probably happens to us, too!

How many times have we noticed in ourselves that in our non-anxious
mode we are happy, jovial and confident until anxiety comes. Then we
erupt or internalize our emotions or, perhaps, we become aggressive or
passive, controlling or easily led.

Under stress, perhaps we may become more vocal or physically
reactive. Or, when anxious, perhaps we become more task-orientated or
people-oriented than we "normally" are.

We’re All Subject To Stress Shifts

These and other behavioral changes are all examples of the
"stress shift" or, as we said above, the "Jekyl and
Hyde" inside you. All of us are subject to these non-anxious and
anxious stress shifts. We, like almost everyone else, may prefer one set
of behaviors when not anxious and prefer a totally different set of
behaviors when anxious.

The stress shift can be observed in individuals to varying degrees.
Some individuals may have a radical stress shift while others may have
less dramatic stress shifts. In some individuals, the stress shift can
be so slight as to be virtually unnoticed.

Examining Our System Roles

Unless we live our lives in total hermetic isolation, our lives are
conducted in various groups or sub-groups. Each group, family systems
theorists tell us, has certain characteristic roles which can be
identified. The main function of these roles is to sustain the
equilibrium of each group.

At least six system roles have been identified which are generally
found in every group, sub-group, or family. These are the Hero, the
Enabler, the Spiritual Leader, the Lost Child, the Mascot, and the
Scapegoat. Descriptions of each of the six system roles are as follows:

1) The Hero:<br> The Hero is the member of the family who is
the focus of positive energies. This individual "plays" or is
"appointed" to be the one everyone admires. His or her
achievements are always elevated while their mistakes are played down.

2) The Enabler:<br> The Enabler is the one who is always
helping others at great sacrifice to themselves, to keep things settled
down. Enablers work to keep the lid on anxieties and to help shield the
system from internal breakdown through compromise, repression, etc.

3) The Spiritual Leader:<br> The Spiritual Leader in the
family is the one to whom the family turns to for guidance, support,
wisdom and insight. Though others may not be "spiritual," the
family’s Spiritual Leader is the one to whom they turn with those items
of religion, fate, and determining the will of God.

4) The Lost Child:<br> The Lost Child is a loner who never
finds themselves. Always in the midst of the family and looking for love
and acceptance, the Lost Child is accommodated but not loved. The Lost
Child is an emotional orphan neglected, uncured for, and left to take
care of himself.

5) The Mascot:<br> In response to the fear of being left out
(as the Lost Child) and a dread of a guilt-ridden loneliness (as the
Scapegoat), the Mascot is marked by visible behaviors which draw
attention to himself. Positive Mascot behavior is marked by the ability
to joke around, provide fun, humor and release of tension in the family.
At other times they will be the "cute" one or clown that
people point to and enjoy. Whether the Mascot’s behavior is constructive
or destruction, one thing is sure: the Mascot will be hard to ignore.

6) The Scapegoat:<br> This family member is the constant
recipient of unfair and hostile projections, many of which may be
undeserved. As steam needs to be released from a boiling keg to keep it
from bursting, so family and relationship systems need a release valve
to ease the "pressure" of family. The Scapegoat is that
release.

The Primary Objective: Equilibrium

Whether Hero or Scapegoat, Enabler or Spiritual Leader, each of
these system roles are shaped, encouraged, modeled, projected and
reinforced to maintain the system’s functional (or dysfunctional) level
of equilibrium. When equilibrium is established, each non-anxious role
is largely in its non-anxious state.

When the system is at equilibrium, the Hero can do no wrong, the
Scapegoat can do no right, the Enabler will always be there to keep the
peace, the Mascot will be acting in an abnormal way, and the Lost Child
will be distantly aloof…somewhere.

When Equilibrium Is Disrupted

When the equilibrium of the system is disrupted by going either from
or to a non-anxious to an anxious state, things within the system may
suddenly and unexpectedly change. In response, single or multiple
individuals within the system undergo a stress shift. Since the stress
shift may result in either an intensification or a shift of their system
role, the system becomes disrupted.

This disruption in equilibrium then initiates a chain reaction which
triggers anxiety-driven stress shifts throughout the rest of the system.
In a domino-like fashion, others in the system respond with the
necessary role transformation. The transformation to anxious state
equilibrium is complete when the system attains a level of equilibrium
the system considers to be an optimum level.

Optimum Equilibrium: The Good News And Bad News

This "optimum" state of equilibrium in each system is
self-determined. Though designated "optimum," this state of
equilibrium may not necessarily be "optimum" for other groups
and systems. This "optimum level" may just as easily create a
functional or healthy equilibrium as it can create a dysfunctional
equilibrium, or a combination of the two. Thus, systems transformed to
their anxious-state optimal equilibrium may use their energies either to
"uproot and tear down, to destroy and overthrow, to build and to
plant" (Jeremiah 1:10 NIV).

When encountering groups in which the anxious-state optimal system
equilibrium is destructive, it is imperative to take preventative
measures to prevent the chain reaction from occurring. Indeed, this
momentum is not only "bad news," but gives ample opportunity
for Satan to wreak havoc, chaos and schism in the Lord’s Church.

On the other hand, when the anxious-state optimal system equilibrium
is constructive and driven by a positive, energizing sense of
immediately achieving God’s vision for the system, the momentum which
can result from the chain reaction is nothing less "good
news." Indeed, such momentum may respond to God’s power and be
blessed in remarkable and miraculous ways!

Examples Of Stress Shift Role Transformations

Examples of stress shift role transformations might include
scenarios such as these. For example, a person who is a Mascot (the
"Joker") in a non-anxious role may, in stress shift, become
more passive, taking on the anxious role of a Lost Child. The one who is
the Spiritual Leader in a non-anxious system may, in the anxious state,
demonstrate more extraverted, daring characteristics and become a Hero
in the anxious system.

Of special interest to pastors and congregational leaders is that in
the same way, one regarded as a Spiritual Leader in the non-anxious
state may, because of his or her own personality tendencies toward
introversion and passivity, may become a Scapegoat of an anxious system.

Possible Role Shift Combinations

What role shifts can you expect? The following table demonstrates
all theoretical possible stress shift role transformations.

(Table: Combinations of Anxious and Non-Anxious System Roles. Sorry,
this is not displayable with plain text email. Table is available in the
html version of this article at the Ministry Health WebSite.)

As this table demonstrates, an individual may be a Mascot in the
non-anxious role and a Hero in their anxious role (Mascot-Hero). Or, an
individual may be a Hero in their non-anxious role and, in their anxious
role, a Scapegoat (Hero-Scapegoat). Other possible combinations include,
for example, Enabler-Mascot, Scapegoat-Hero, et al. As the table
indicates, individuals may have identical non-anxious and anxious roles,
e.g. Enabler-Enabler, Mascot-Mascot, Spiritual Leader-Spiritual Leader,
et al.

Some Applications

* Since stress shifts are so common, Pastors and church leaders
ought to expect that the behaviors and system roles of every
individual–including themselves–will change in an anxious environment.
For the same reason, Pastors and church leaders ought to expect
corresponding stress shifts in the respective groups to which they
belong.

* Each individual and system has different anxiety tolerances and
sensitivities. Thus, what causes anxiety in one individual or group may
not affect another individual or group.

* You can’t treat everyone and every group alike.Nor should you.
They all have different needs, different anxiety triggers, differing
levels of sensitivity, different system roles, and different needs for
equilibrium.

* Those whom individuals and groups you can trust in non-anxious
states may or may not be trusted in their anxious states.

* Since anxious states can be elicited by a virtually limitless
number of possible stimuli, the only way to really know the anxious
response is to experience the anxious state. This is where pastoral
ministry must be exercised with great patience and care.

* Pastoral ministering to congregations can be greatly disrupted by
pastors and leaders who do not understand their stress shifts and are
not willing or able to adjust them, when necessary, to address system
anxieties in an appropriate manner.

* Ministering to people in their anxious role can be rather
unpredictable and unsettling.

* Often, ministry to such individuals in their stress shift may
demand enormous amounts of energy and exact a great price.

* The greater the number and influence of functional sub-group and
group systems existing in a congregation, especially in anxious modes,
the greater the likelihood that anxiety, conflict and challenges will
invigorate the congregation toward God’s vision of growth for that
congregation.

* The more a congregation is dominated by dysfunctional sub-groups
and group systems, especially in anxious modes, the greater the
likelihood that these dysfunctional dynamics will, by definition, favor
those things which characterize a dysfunctional church. (Cf. Ministry
Health Article "Characteristics Of A Dysfunctional Church").

* Pastors and church leaders must be sensitive to manage stress
factors within the context of systems so as to prevent unwanted chain
reactions of dysfunctional systems in stress shift and to encourage
desirable ministry support by eliciting positive chain reactions in
functional congregational systems.

* Management of stress and anxiety factors is not simply the use of
appropriate administrative strategies and tools such as mediation
techniques, building of community, enhanced communication, charismatic
persuasion, etc. Though these may be helpful and instrumental, the most
important tool is use and proclaim the Word of God in such a way to
communicate the message of Law and Gospel, contrition and repentance,
trust and faith, to give all individuals and systems the essential
fundamental base necessary for a proper response to God in all
times–anxious and non-anxious.

* Congregational systems which tend, especially in their stress
shift, to place the pastor in a Scapegoat role, will tend to persist in
this behavior. Over time, some of these systems may become quite good at
it and permeate their influence into other systems.

Thus, some congregational systems whose equilibrium requires the
pastor to be Scapegoat will persist in this equilibrium until acted upon
from forces–within or without–that can change them.

* Though there are many possibilities for transforming and healing
dysfunctional systems, often the way God brings real change to these
systems is through the pain of recognition of their sinful dysfunction
or the pain of conflict. In the past, God used drastic pain application
to the Northern and Southern Kingdoms when they persisted in their
hardness of heart. God can also work in His Church in the same way
today. Indeed, He does!

* Ultimately, the only power pastors and church leaders have to
develop healthy individuals and congregational systems, is the Word of
God. It is the most powerful "double-edged" sword. it is the
"dynamite" of God. Whatever the apparent results of this
working during our ministry, God’s Word always has the promise: it will
not return void without accomplishing what God intended. In God’s time,
His will shall prevail.

Some Additional Observations

The overall cumulative effect of stress shifts within systems can go
a long way to explain a number of congregational dynamics, especially in
conflict. Relative to congregations this may explain some other
congregational phenomena such as…

1) Why members may suddenly display inexplicable "Jekyl and
Hyde" behaviors;

2) Why seemingly peaceful and pleasant churches can, in an anxious
state, become quite unstable and destructive;

3) Why pastors may act "out of character" from their
normal "non-anxious" role in conflict;

4) Why congregational leaders and pastors, who undergo their own
stress shifts, may not be able to handle crisis in a congregation which
is also in stress shift;

5) Why pastors suddenly find themselves "betrayed" or
alone without the expected and experienced support in relatively
non-anxious system conditions;

6) Why some members, in conflict, will become unusually vocal while
others will escape (e.g. Lost Child) and leave the church without saying
a word to anyone;

No doubt, stress shifts and the cumulative "chain
reaction" type effect of stress shift may help explain a number of
other things you may have experienced in your congregation, too..

What Can A Pastor Or Leader Do?

What are some ways a pastor can address anxiety to reduce, if
possible, the potential for stress shift manifestations in the church?

1) Recognize that often, when people express their anxious reactions
in the church, the presented issue is probably not the issue (cf.
Ministry Health Article, "The Issue Is Not The Issue")

2) Especially in anxious times, adopt a strategy for pastoral care
including a personal visit to the homes of the anxious on an individual
basis to discuss and, if possible, soothe their anxiety. When on their
own home territory, individuals will likely feel "safer" to
share their anxieties. Sometimes during such visits, keen observers will
note certain clues to the cause(s) of the anxiety in their home, work,
family, etc.

3) When individuals take on additional responsibilities and
circumstances (e.g. become single parents, take care of elderly parent
in the home, lose a job, take on a second job, dealing with adolescent
rebellion, face retirement, etc), take special notice of the potential
for stress shifts. often used in marketing and evangelistic literature
to measure "receptivity," the Holmes-Rahe Stress indicator may
be especially helpful to identify various individual stressors.

4) When stress occurs, expect behavioral changes in such individuals
and respond appropriately. Offer an appropriate degree of quality,
empathetic pastoral support as early as possible so that they understand
that you recognize their situation. Give assurances of your concern and
be prayerfully supportive and pastorally available as they have need.
This is especially important in your ministry to those high-anxiety
individuals who, in their anxious stress shifts, take on antagonistic
system roles.

5) When anxiety regarding church issues is expressed, provide an
appropriate forum for the anxiety to be voiced and expressed. Listen to
their concerns and help them look for opportunities to address their
issues and concerns. Nothing soothes like a genuinely listening ear.

6) Listening and empathy, however, do not preclude that the ministry
of the congregation must stop in its tracks.

6) Help foster a congregational environment which does not inhibit
an ongoing appropriate sharing of personal anxieties. Prayer partners,
varieties of small fellowship groups (e.g. sharing, recovery, etc, and
after worship altar counselors, etc.) can go a long way to build such an
environment.After all, isn’t anxiety reduction through trusting God and
His leading in our lives what prayer, worship, and Bible Study are
really all about?

7) Have periodic sermon series or Bible Classes on various
Biblically-based, anxiety-related relationship issues (e.g. divorce,
marriage enrichment, how to take care of the elderly, boundaries, adult
child issues, substance abuse, how to deal with suffering, development
of Christian coping mechanisms, etc.)

8) Have leaders list the anxieties which they feel are in the
congregation and brainstorm ways that they and the congregation can
positively and effectively addressed these anxiety needs.

9) Make a study of Edwin Friedman’s landmark book, From Generation
to Generation.especially as it relates to your situation. Chapters 8 and
9 of Friedman’s book are especially insightful.

10) Consider leading a workshop or seminar on congregational
anxiety. One possible workshop might be "Reasons For Congregational
Conflict" in the Ministry Health Web Site Resource Archives. Of
course, consider other Ministry Health articles which may be helpful
resources for you or your leaders.

11) Never scapegoat those in their anxious stress shifts. Deal with
them with the most prudent pastoral care possible. The most highly
sensitive and anxious often have a history of distrust, especially of
leaders (e.g. pastors). Go easy and try to understand them (cf. Ministry
Health’s "Thirteen Ways To Recognize The Adult Child…" and
other related Ministry Health Articles).

12) Finally, when anxiety and conflict start to build, do not
hesitate to contact your judicatory or denominational executives. Those
who are skilled with conflict situations may be quite willing to give
their support. Do not consider it a weakness to seek their counsel and
support. A timely intervention by an outsider can literally save
congregations and pastors untold measures of grief, anger and
frustration.

The Most Important Thing

Of course, the most important thing when dealing with the
Jekyl-Hyde’s in your church, is to continually seek and patiently (read
"painstakingly") follow God’s guidance. Whether a non-anxious
"Jekyl" or an anxious "Hyde", His promises to us and
to those whom we ministry are always the same. Cast all your burdens and
anxieties on Him and let Him be faithful to lead, guide and protect His
church as He so determines.

Thomas F. Fischer
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Thomas F. Fischer,
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