From: Skell Rad <>
Newsgroups: alt.atheism.moderated
Date: Friday, 5 March 1999 3:15
Subject: Re: I don't want god at my funeral

DAHW422 wrote:
>
> I went to a funeral service today in a Baptist church in Texas. Now I'm
> thinking I should put specific instructions in my will as to how I want any
> memorial service conducted. Any suggestions for books, authors, excerpts,
> poetry, etc. would be welcome.

I have a couple of items to offer.

There's a memorable passage from D.A.F. Sade's Last Will and Testament
(1806). After a precaution against premature burial, he requests a
designate be notified to convey his body  "to the wood upon my property
at Malmaison near Epernon, in the commune of Emance where I would have
it laid to rest, without ceremony of any kind, in the first copse
standing to the right as the said wood is entered from the side of the
old chateau by way of the broad lane dividing it. The ditch opened in
this copse shall be dug by the farmer tenant of Malmaison under M. Le
Normand's supervision, who shall not leave my body until after he has
placed it in the said ditch; upon this occasion he may, if he so wishes,
be accompanied by those among my kinsmen or friends who without display
or pomp of any sort whatsoever shall have been kind enough to give me
this last proof of their attachment. The ditch once covered over, above
it acorns shall be strewn, in order that the spot become green again,
and the copse grown back thick over it, the traces of my grave may
disappear from the face of the earth as I trust the memory of me shall
fade out of the minds of all men save nevertheless for those few who in
their goodness have loved me until the last and of whom I carry away a
sweet remembrance with me to the grave." ("Justine, Philosophy in the
Bedroom and other writings", Grove Press) His wishes were ignored.

There's actually a nice bit of poetry in scripture that would make a
good funeral read. It's from The Book of Wisdom, which is in some
version other than the King James. Luis Bunuel pointed it out in his
autobiography "My Last Sigh." He rates it as "far superior to the Song
of Songs," and suggests "the author had to put these words into the
mouths of unbelievers to get them printed." The poem is prefixed with:
"For they have said, reasoning with themselves, but not right:"

Book of Wisdom, Chapter II, verses 1-9:

 The time of our life is short and tedious, and in the end of a man
there is no remedy, and no man hath been known to have returned from
hell:
 For we are born of nothing, and after this we shall be as if we had not
been; for the breath in our nostrils is smoke: and speech a spark to
move our heart,
 Which being put out, our body shall be ashes, and our spirit shall be
poured abroad as soft air, and our life shall pass away as the trace of
a cloud, and shall be dispersed as a mist, which is driven away by the
beams of the sun, and overpowered with the heat thereof:
 And our name in time shall be forgotten, and no man shall have any
remembrance of our works.
 For our time is as the passing of a shadow, and there is no going back
of our end: for it is fast sealed, and no man returneth.
 Come therefore, and let us enjoy the good things that are present, and
let us speedily use the creatures as in youth.
 Let us fill ourselves with costly wine, and ointments: and let not the
flower of time pass by us.
 Let us crown ourselves with roses, before they be withered: let no
meadow escape our riot.
 Let none of us go without his part in luxury: let us everywhere have
tokens of joy: for this is our portion, and this our lot.

 If music is needed, there's a folk song from the British Isles I like
called "What's the Life of a Man?":

 What's the life of a man any more than a leaf?
 A man has his seasons so why should he grieve?
 For although in this world we appear fine and gay
 Like a leaf we must wither and soon fade away.

Near the end there's some lines about a churchyard which some meddlesome
christian inserted. The song can be found at
http://www.mudcat.org/cgi-shl/as_web.exe?Spring98+D+11543073.

From: Rowland Croucher <>
Newsgroups: alt.atheism.moderated
Date: Sunday, 14 March 1999 4:53
Subject: Re: I don't want God at My Funeral


Charles Fiterman wrote in message <>...
>
>Coleman Smith wrote:
>
>> DAHW422 wrote:
>> >
>> > I went to a funeral service today in a Baptist church in Texas. Now I'm
>> > thinking I should put specific instructions in my will as to how I want any
>> > memorial service conducted. Any suggestions for books, authors, excerpts,
>> > poetry, etc. would be welcome.

As a clergyperson (and therefore conductor of funerals) I'd encourage people
to talk about the kind of funeral they want ahead of the inevitable. I as
the conductor of the 'occasion'/service always respect those wishes - even
if the person wants a non-religious funeral - and the family agrees... But
the point that the funeral is for the grieving as much as for the deceased
is a valid one: occasionally it's tricky burying an avowed atheist if the
family is very religious!

[Someone already made the comment that God will be there anyway, so I'll let
that pass...]

>> Coleman writes:

>May I suggest giving your body to the medical school. Very good people go to the
>medical school when they die. You can insert a condition that they have to
>dispose of it and not use it for religious services. They will have well worded
>agreements that allow the use of spare parts.

I'll be doing that too, as I think the 'funeral industry' is a rip-off. But
I'm allowing my family to conduct whatever 'Thanksgiving Service' they want
to - for their sakes/comfort. And they know my favorite Scriptures and
songs...


Shalom!  Rowland Croucher                             ()