Humor
Bear
*Ready, Set, Go* Two campers, Chris and Michael, are awakened by the sounds of an obviously large bear outside their tent, looking for food at their campsite. Immediately, Chris pulls a pair of running shoes out of his backpack and quickly puts them on. Incredulous, his friend Michael says, “There’s no way you can outrun […]
It’s In The Fridge
I have my own system for labeling homemade freezer meals. Forget calling them “Veal Parmigiana” or “Turkey Loaf” or “Beef Pot Pie.” If you look in my freezer you’ll see “Whatever,” “Anything,” “I Don’t Know,” and, my favorite, “Food.” That way when I ask my husband what he wants for dinner, I’m certain to have […]
How Government Works
HOW GOVERNMENT WORKS Once upon a time, the government had a vast scrap yard in the middle of the desert. Congress said, “Someone may steal from it at night.” So they created a night watchman position and hired a person for the job. Then Congress said, “How does the watchman do his job without instruction?” […]
Hitch-Hike
A guy was on the side of the road hitchhiking on a very dark night and in the middle of a storm. The night was rolling on and no car went by. The storm was so strong he could hardly see a few feet ahead of him. Suddenly he saw a car coming toward him […]
Slow Internet Connection
Ten Ways You Know Your Internet Connection Is A Little Slow 1. Text on Web pages displays as Morse Code 2. Graphics arrive via FedEx 3. You believe a heavier string might improve your connection 4. You post a message to your favorite newsgroup and it displays a week later 5. Your credit card expires […]
Busy
An out-of-towner in New York at the height of the tourist season decided to revisit an uptown restaurant he’d enjoyed on a previous trip to the city. Finally catching the eye of an overworked waiter, he said, “You know, it’s been over five years since I first came in here.” “You’ll have to wait your […]
Bin Laden And Heaven
You better brush up on your American history first.. After dying a grisly death in an Afghan cave, Osama Bin Laden made his way to the Pearly Gates. Before he could get to talk to St Peter, he was greeted by George Washington. “I’ve been waiting for you! How dare you attack the nation I […]
Waiting Time
A company offered tours through the historic district, led by guides dressed in Colonial clothing. While leading a group, one of the guides, tripped and fell, breaking his wrist. He went to the hospital, and as he sat waiting in the emergency room, a policeman walked by. Doing a double take at him in his […]
Questions
A man took his son fishing one day. After a few hours in the boat with not much to do, the son started asking his father some questions. “How does the boat float?” he asked. The man thought about the question for a moment, then said, “I don’t really know, son.” “Well, how do fish […]
Sons And Mothers
A little boy forgot his lines in a Sunday School presentation. His mother, sitting in the front row to prompt him, gestured and formed the words silently with her lips, but it didn’t help. Her son’s memory was blank. Finally she leaned forward and whispered the cue, “I am the light of the world.” The […]
Categories
Articles may be reproduced in any medium, without applying for permission
(provided they are unedited, and retain the original author/copyright information - and a reference to this website :-)!
26,756 articles online.
Protected by Akismet, Digital Ninjas and an Ion Cannon. Really.
Blog with WordPress