Humor
Lucky Man
Then there was the story about a man commuting to work by train, who found a newspaper on seat beside him. Picking it up, he noted it had tomorrow’s date on it. Can’t be! Must be a misprint! But the news, and especially sports page, did seem to indicate otherwise. He checked the horse races, […]
In the Beginning
When the new patient was settled comfortably on the couch, the psychiatrist began his therapy session. “I’m not aware of your problem,” the doctor said. “So perhaps, you should start at the very beginning.” “Of course.” replied the patient. “In the beginning, I created the Heavens and the Earth…”
Hunters
A couple of hunters from Prague are out hunting, and an emormous bear runs up and in a single gulp devours one of the hunters. Miraculously, the swallowed hunter remained alive, trapped in the belly of the grizzly. The other hunter runs back to town and organizes a rescue party which heads back to the […]
Men Whingeing Again
If you put a woman on a pedestal and try to protect her from the rat race …you’re a male chauvinist. If you stay home and do the housework …. you’re a pansy. If you work too hard …. there’s never any time for her. If you don’t work enough …. you’re a good-for-nothing bum. […]
The Baptist White Lie Cake
Have you ever told a white lie? You are going to love this, especially all of the ladies who bake for church events: Alice Grayson was to bake a cake for the Baptist Church Ladies’ Group in Tuscaloosa, but forgot to do it until the last minute. She remembered it the morning of the bake […]
Choose the right verse
An elderly woman had just returned to her home from an evening of church services when she was startled by an intruder. She caught the man in the act of robbing her home of its valuables and yelled “STOP! Acts 2:38!” (Repent and be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ, so that your sins […]
More Puns
1. A vulture boards an airplane, carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at him and says, “I’m sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger.” 2. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the other and says ” Dam !”. 3. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so […]
Cookies
My pastor-husband has a sweet tooth, so I knew the chocolate chip cookies I’d just baked might disappear before I returned from running errands. To discourage him, I taped a verse on the wrapped goodies: “‘Everything is permissible for me’ — but not everything is beneficial … ” (1 Cor. 6:12). When I returned I […]
You have tomorrow to recover
Evidence has emerged that William Tell’s family were avid bowlers. However, since a fire destroyed all the old Swiss league records, so we’ll never know for whom the Tells bowled. A man rushed into a doctor’s clinic, shouting, “Help me! I think I’m shrinking!!” The receptionist calmly replied: “The doctor’s busy. Please be a little […]
Receptionist
A man rushed into a doctor’s clinic, shouting, “Help me! I’m invisible!!” The receptionist replied: “The doctor can’t see you right now!” ***** A man rushed into a doctor’s clinic, shouting, “Help me! People keep treating me like I’m invisible!!” Receptionist: “Who said that?” *****
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