Humor
Church Bulletin Bloopers (some old some new)
They’re Back! Those wonderful Church Bulletins! Thank God for church ladies with typewriters. These sentences actually appeared in church bulletins or were announced in church services: The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals. The sermon this morning: “Jesus Walks on the Water.” The sermon tonight: “Searching for Jesus.” Ladies, don’t forget the rummage sale. It’s […]
Nameless Hurricane
Not sure why this one in particular appealed to my warped sense of humour… http://www.theonion.com/content/news/nameless_hurricane_that_much_more — Shalom/Salaam/Pax! Rowland Croucher http://jmm.org.au/ (20,000 articles 4000 humor) Blogs – http://rowlandsblogs.blogspot.com/ Justice for Dawn Rowan – http://dawnrowansaga.blogspot.com/ Funny Jokes and Pics – http://funnyjokesnpics.blogspot.com/
Taliban and Jew
A fleeing Taliban, desperate for water, was plodding through the Afghanistan desert when he saw something far off in the distance. Hoping to find water, he hurried toward the object, only to find a little old Jewish man at a small stand selling ties. The Taliban asked, “Do you have water?” The Jewish man replied, […]
Blonde Men
Three blonde men are stranded on an island. Suddenly a fairy appears and offers to grant each one of them a wish. The first blonde asks to be intelligent. Instantly, he is turned into a brown-haired man and swims off the island. The next one asks to be even more intelligent than the previous one, […]
My favourite things
When Julie Andrews turned 69 to commemorate her birthday she made a special appearance at Manhattan ‘s Radio City Music Hall. One of the musical numbers she performed was “My Favorite Things” from the legendary movie “Sound Of Music.” Here are the lyrics she used: Maalox and nose drops and needles for knitting, Walkers and […]
Nervous Priest
A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly speak. After mass he asked the monsignor how he had done. The monsignor replied, “When I am worried about getting nervous on the pulpit, I put a glass of vodka next to the water glass. If I start to get nervous, I […]
Catholic School Girl
One day, at a Catholic school run by nuns, the Mother Superior is teaching a class when the regular teacher is taken ill. “Now, class,” she says, “I’m going to go around the room and ask each of you what you want to be when you grow up.” “What’s your name,” she asks the first […]
Dry Weather
Apparently, it’s so dry in North Carolina that the Baptists are starting to baptize by sprinkling, the Methodists are using wet-wipes, the Presbyterians are giving out rain-checks, and the Catholics are praying for the wine to turn back into water. Now THAT’s Dry!
Zoo Keeper
A man starts his new job at the zoo and is given three tasks. First is to clear the exotic fish pool of weeds. As he does this, a huge fish jumps out and bites him. To show the others who’s boss, he beats it to death with a spade. Realising his employer won’t be […]
Airline Quotes
I’ve flown in North American airlines where such things – and better/worse – are said. Never the British, or European, or Australian, certainly not Asian… Rowland. ¬ ¬ ¬ AIRLINE QUOTES: All too rarely, airline attendants make an effort to make the in- flight “safety lecture” and their other announcements a bit more entertaining. Here are some […]
Categories
Articles may be reproduced in any medium, without applying for permission
(provided they are unedited, and retain the original author/copyright information - and a reference to this website :-)!
26,756 articles online.
Protected by Akismet, Digital Ninjas and an Ion Cannon. Really.
Blog with WordPress