Humor
Miscellaneous
The marriage counsellor asked the woman when she had first noticed marital problems. “They started when he wanted to be in the wedding photographs,” she replied. ~~~ Advertising………Car wash..$1 per car; senior citizens washed free. ~~~ ………………………. For sale….smoker’s chair, solid ash.
Traffic Jams
TODAYS RIDDLE : Fill in the sentence below so that the first two words combine to make the third word. For example, given “The prime minister ____ the meeting, even though the ____ was technically the ____ official,” you would fill in RAN, KING, and RANKING. If there is not enough light to ____, ____ […]
Londoners
A Londoner parks his brand new Porsche in front of the office to show it off to his colleagues. As he’s getting out of the car, a lorry comes speeding along too close to the kerb and takes off the door before zooming off. More than a little distraught, the Londoner grabs his mobile and […]
Bible Stories Told by Children
BIBLE STORIES STORY OF ELIJAH The Sunday school teacher was carefully explaining the story of Elijah, the Prophet and the false prophets of Baal. She explained how Elijah built the altar, put wood upon it, cut the steer in pieces, and laid it upon the altar And then Elijah commanded the people of God to […]
Loan for a Frog
A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patricia Whack. Miss Whack, I’d like to get a $30,000 loan to take a holiday.” Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says his name is Kermit Jagger, his […]
Tracking Santa
http://www.noradsanta.org/en/tracking.php
Compliant Merry Christmas
Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, nonaddictive, gender neutral celebration of the summer solstice holiday, practised with the most enjoyable traditions of religious persuasion or secular practices of your choice with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not […]
Three little pigs
The Three Little Pigs Three Little Pigs went out to dinner one night. The waiter came and took their drink order. “I would like a Sprite,” said the first little piggy. “I would like a Coke,” said the second little piggy. “I want beer, lots and lots of beer,” said the third little piggy. The […]
Urgent Forwarded
Dear friends, With Christmas almost upon us, I’d like to extend my heartfelt appreciation to all of you who have taken the time and trouble to send me “forwards” over the past 12 months. Thank you for making me feel safe, secure, blessed and healthy. * Extra thanks to whoever sent me the email about […]
Two Eskimos
Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Not surprisingly, it sank, proving once again that you can’t have your kayak and heat it too.
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