Humor
Riddles and more
TODAYS RIDDLE: The more you take, the more you leave behind. What are they? /\ x x x x x Scroll down for the answer x x x x x Here it comes x x x x x \/ Footsteps. ============================= Two little boys are talking to each other. One of them says, “What does […]
Riddle etc.
TODAYS RIDDLE: At a local bar, three friends, Mr. Green, Mr. Red and Mr. Blue, were having a drink. One man was wearing a red suit; one a green suit; and the other a blue suit. “Have you noticed,” said the man the blue suit, “that although our suits have colors corresponding to our names, […]
Church Fund-raising
CHURCH’S NEW TERROR ALERT ELEVATED TO CODE ORANGE by Horace Pook, Sacred Sandwich Reporter March 2005 — Taking their cue from the nation’s Homeland Security Advisory System, the overseers at Pierpoint Community Church have recently elevated the threat of a new building campaign to Code Orange, which indicates a high probability of asking the congregation […]
Sermon Specs
Look attentive at church! The original Sermon Specs Tired of waking up with your forehead hitting the front pew? Has the “pretending to pray” act gone stale? Try the revolutionary new product to combat sermon-induced comas and church fatigue. With Sermon Specs, you’ll be the pastor’s best friend! READ THESE FINE TESTIMONIALS “I like the […]
Golf
Stevie Wonder buttonholed Tiger Woods at the Oscars. “Hey Tiger, I’ve always wanted to take you on for a round of golf” “Don’t be stupid. I’m one of the world’s best and you’re blind!” “Wait, Tiger! I’ve been practising, and I’ve trained caddies to stand along the fairway and call out to me. As I […]
Ministry changes name to Campus Jihad for Christ
ORLANDO – In an effort to broaden their international appeal, Campus Crusade for Christ, the venerable evangelism organization founded by Bill and Vonette Bright 52 years ago, has changed its name to Campus Jihad for Christ. “When the ministry started in 1951, ‘crusade’ was a bold, evocative word,” says Campus Jihad spokesman Tony Ulkes. “Now […]
When he prophesies, it’s in pirate
OAK RIDGE, Tenn. – Sam Brobst took a “Learning Your Spiritual Gift” course at Full Life Center, a charismatic church, and felt the Lord leading him to prophesy during meetings. But when Brobst opened his mouth the first time, he and others were surprised by what came out: pirate speak. “We were in the middle […]
In church
Two old dears are seated together in church and after the service has finished one turns to the other and says “my bottom has gone to sleep” and the other replies “yes I know it snored three times”…
The Mississippi Squirrel Revival
Well, when I was a kid I’d take a trip every summer down the Mississippi To visit my granny in her antebellum world I’d run barefooted all day long climbin’ trees free as a song And one day I happened to catch myself a squirrel Well, I stuffed him down in an old shoe box, […]
Useful Phrases At Work
I don’t work here. I’m a consultant. Thank you.We’re all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view. I’ll try being nicer if you’ll try being smarter. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you. I’m not being rude. You’re just insignificant. I’m really easy to get along with once you […]
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