Humor
Tail Light
“How long have you been driving without a tail light, buddy?” demanded the policeman. The driver jumped out, ran to the rear of his car, and gave a low moan. His distress was so great that the cop was moved to ease up on him a bit. “Aw, come now,” he said, “you don’t have […]
Newlywed Repairs
A man came home from the office and found his new bride sobbing convulsively. “I feel terrible,” she told him. “I was pressing your suit and I burned a big hole in the seat of your trousers.” “Oh, just forget it,” consoled her husband. “Remember that I’ve got an extra pair of pants for that […]
One Wish
A man walking along a California beach was deep in prayer. Suddenly the sky clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, the Lord said, “Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish.” The man said, “Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can […]
The 12 Steps to Total and Complete Insanity
The 12 Steps to Total and Complete Insanity 1. We admitted we were powerless over nothing. We could manage our lives perfectly and we could manage those of anyone else that would allow it. 2. Came to believe that there was no power greater than ourselves, and the rest of the world was insane. 3. […]
FIRST GRADE PROVERBS
A first grade teacher collected well-known proverbs. She gave each child in her class the first half of a proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb. Their insight may surprise you. Better to be safe than…………..Punch a 5th grader Strike while the …………………Bug is close It’s always darkest before……… […]
Young Again
MY RESIGNATION I am hereby officially tendering my resignation as an adult. I have decided I would like to accept the responsibilities of an 8 year-old again. I want to go to McDonald’s and think that it’s a four star restaurant. I want to sail sticks across a fresh mud puddle and make a sidewalk […]
Actual Hiker Comments
These are actual comments left last year on Forest Service registration sheets and comment cards by backpackers completing wilderness camping trips: “A small deer came into my camp and stole my bag of pickles. Is there a way I can get reimbursed? Please call.” “Escalators would help on steep uphill sections.” “Instead of a permit […]
More Too Much Coffee
You know you’ve been drinking too much coffee when… You can take a picture of yourself from ten feet away without using the timer. You get a speeding ticket even when you’re parked. You just completed another sweater… and you don’t know how to knit! You answer the door before people knock. You have to […]
Travel Deal
A travel agent said to his customer, “I can get you three days and two nights in Rome for a hundred bucks.” “How come so cheap?” replied the customer. The travel agent told him, “The days are July 11, 12 and 13. The nights are July 21 and 22.”
Cow Puzzler
This is a cool puzzler. See if you can follow it – out loud is even better! 1. Say COW before each word: Cows About Talking You Got I Long How Look 2. Say COW after each word: Cows < About < Talking < You < Got < I < Long < How < Look
Categories
Articles may be reproduced in any medium, without applying for permission
(provided they are unedited, and retain the original author/copyright information - and a reference to this website :-)!
26,756 articles online.
Protected by Akismet, Digital Ninjas and an Ion Cannon. Really.
Blog with WordPress