Humor
Get the Facts
A group of country neighbors wanted to get together on a regular basis and socialize. As a result, about 10 couples formed a dinner club and agreed to meet for dinner at a different neighbors’ house each month. Of course the lady of the house was to prepare the meal. When it came time for […]
What if God has an answering machine?
We have learned to live with answering machines as a necessary part of modernization. But I have often wondered what would happen if GOD decided to install and automated answering machine? Imagine praying and hearing this: “Thank you for calling My Father’s house”. Please select one of the following four options: Press 1 for requests; […]
Florists
Some friars were behind in their belfry payments, so they opened a small florist shop to raise the funds. Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the men of God, the rival florist across town thought the competition was unfair.He asked the good fathers to close down, but they would not. He went back and […]
Ways and Means
One day, three men were hiking and unexpectedly came upon a large raging, violent river. They needed to get to the other side, but had no idea how. The first man prayed to God, saying, “Please God, give me the strength to cross this river.” Poof! God gave him big arms and strong legs, and […]
Hymn selection
There was a feud between a Pastor and his Choir Director. It seems the first hint of trouble came when the Pastor preached on dedicating yourselves to service and the Choir Director chose to sing: “I Shall Not Be Moved.” Trying to believe it was a coincidence, the Pastor put the incident behind him. The […]
A Brief Meditation
With apologies to Reinhold Niebuhr God grant me the senility to forget those I never liked the good fortune to keep bumping into those I did and the eyesight to tell the difference. Funny, I can’t recall becoming absent minded.
Stolen?
Two cars are waiting at a stoplight. The light turns green, but the man in front doesn’t notice it. A woman in the car behind him is watching traffic pass around them. The woman begins pounding on her steering wheel and yelling at the man to move. The man doesn’t move. The woman is going […]
All in a name
The manager of a large office noticed a new man one day and told him to come into his office.”What is your name?” was the first thing the manager asked the new guy. “John,” the new guy replied.The manager scowled, “Look… I don’t know what kind of a namby-pamby place you worked at before, but […]
Truthful Gossip 3
(by Kim Thoday) As told to me by Jimmy “Truthful” Jones at the Bayview Hotel in Melbourne, in 2003. Why did the Senior Minister (Pastor) cross the road? Possible answers: Cause it was pragmatic to do so Cause it was decisive Cause there was a good business opportunity Cause it was a good career move […]
A Few Jokes
Did you hear about the guy that lost his left arm and leg in a car crash? He’s all right now. What do the letters D.N.A. stand for? National Dyslexics Association. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t work? A stick. Why are there so many Smiths in the phone book? They all have […]
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