Humor
Prayer For Money
A businessman needed millions of dollars to close an important business transaction. He went to church to pray for the money. He knelt in prayer next to a man who was praying for a hundred dollars to pay an urgent debt. The businessman took out his wallet and pressed the hundred dollars into the other […]
Marriage Blues
As a new bride, Aunt Edna moved into the small home on her husband’s ranch near Snowflake. She put a shoe box on a shelf in her closet and asked her husband never to touch it. For fifty years Uncle Jack left the box alone, until Aunt Edna was old and dying. One day when […]
The Hokey Pokey
What with all the sadness and trauma going on in the world at the moment, it is worth reflecting on the almost unnoticed death last week of a very important person. Larry La Prise, the man who wrote “The Hokey Pokey”, died peacefully at home. He was 93. The most traumatic part for his family […]
Work Rules
1. Never walk without a document in your hands People with documents in their hands look like hardworking employees heading for important meetings. People with nothing in their hands look like they’re heading for the canteen. People with a newspaper in their hand look like they’re heading for the toilet. Above all, make sure you […]
The Word
A woman arrived at the gates of Heaven. While she was waiting for St. Peter to greet her, she peeked through the gates. She saw a beautiful banquet table. Sitting all around were her parents and all the other people she had loved and who had died before her. They saw her and began calling […]
Letters Kids Wrote To God. Part 1
1. Dear God, Please put another holiday between Christmas and Easter. There is nothing good in there now. Amanda 2. Dear God, Thank you for the baby brother but what I asked for was a puppy. I never asked for anything before. You can look it up. Joyce 3. Dear Mr. God, I wish you […]
Horses
Two cowboy friends, Wally and Dallas, each bought a horse one summer. They enjoyed riding around and doing the things that cowboys do. When winter came, however, they did not want to pay to have their horses stabled for the winter. Instead, they decided to release them in a pasture and get them in the […]
Excuses To Give When You Have Missed Work
~ I can’t come in to work today because I’ll be stalking my previous boss, who fired me for not s showing up for work. Okay? ~ I have a rare case of 48-hour projectile leprosy, but I know we have that deadline to meet… ~ I am stuck in the blood pressure machine down […]
Iraq (Another One)
Have you seen the plans for the Iraq war memorial? They’re going to inscribe the names of all the dead soldiers onto a giant marble gaspump.
Growing Old
What a difference 30 years makes: 1972: Long hair 2002: Longing for hair 1972: The perfect high 2002: The perfect high yield mutual fund 1972: Acid rock 2002: Acid reflux 1972: Moving to California because it’s cool 2002: Moving to California because it’s warm 1972: Growing pot 2002: Growing pot belly 1972: Trying to look […]
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