Humor
Is It True? (Some Responses)
(I’ve seen some of these, but not all of them. At least one of these statements is not true. Which? Any others?) Several: The three most valuable brand names on earth: Marlboro, Coca-Cola, and Budweiser, in that order. [this one is dubious and probably untrue] A duck’s quack doesn’t echo and no one knows why. […]
Is It True?
And You Thought You Knew EVERYTHING… Mosquito repellents don’t repel. They hide you. The spray blocks the mosquito’s sensors so they don’t know you’re there. Dentists have recommended that a toothbrush be kept at least 6 feet away from a toilet to avoid airborne particles resulting from the flush. The liquid inside young coconuts can […]
Classes For Men And Women
Classes, enrolments close soon!!!! CLASSES FOR MEN. Note: due to the complexity and level of difficulty of their contents each course will accept a maximum of eight participants each. Topic 1. How to fill ice-cube trays. Step by step with slide presentation. Topic 2. Lavatory paper rolls: do they grow on the holders? Round-table discussion. […]
Living In Zimbabwe Is Heaven
We heaven got petrol We heaven got deesil We heaven got lectriciti We heaven got wota We heaven got mealie meal We heaven got cooking oiol We heaven got majareen We heaven got wek We heaven got forex We heaven got munnee We heaven got sugar We heaven got good lection results We heaven got […]
Work Rules (More)
1. Never walk without a document in your hands People with documents in their hands look like hardworking employees heading for important meetings. People with nothing in their hands look like they’re heading for the canteen. People with a newspaper in their hand look like they’re heading for the toilet. Above all, make sure you […]
Changing A Light Bulb The Christian Way
[Most (all?) of these are included in other light bulb jokes here]. How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb? Charismatic: Only 1 Hands already in the air. Pentecostal: 10 One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness. Presbyterians: None Lights will go on and off […]
St George And The Dragon
A poor vagabond, traveling a country road in England, tired and hungry, came to a roadside inn with a sign reading: “George and the Dragon.” He knocked. The innkeeper’s wife stuck her head out a window. “Could ye spare some victuals?” he asked. The woman glanced at his shabby clothes and obviously poor condition. “No!” […]
Smart Math/S
ROMANCE MATHS Smart man + smart woman = romance Smart man + dumb woman = affair Dumb man + smart woman = marriage Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy OFFICE ARITHMETIC Smart boss + smart employee = profit Smart boss + dumb employee = production Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion Dumb boss […]
Paddy’s War
Saddam Hussein was sitting in his office wondering whom to invade next when his telephone rang. A heavily Irish-accented voice said, “Hello, Mr Hussein. This is Paddy down at the Harp Pub in County Sligo, Ireland. I am ringing to inform you that we are officially declaring war on you.” “Well, Paddy,” Saddam replied, “this […]
Customs
After an overnight flight to meet my father at his latest military assignment, my mother wearily arrived at Rhein-Main Air Base in Germany with my eight siblings and me – all under age 11. Collecting our many suitcases, the ten of us entered the cramped customs area. A young customs official watched our entourage in […]
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