Humor
Church Kids Say The Darnedest Things
One Sunday in a Midwest city a young child was “acting up” during the morning worship hour. The parents did their best to maintain some sense of order in the pew but were losing the battle. Finally the father picked the little fellow up and walked sternly up the aisle on his way out. Just […]
Parenting
SMILE…YOU’RE A PARENT!?! 1. Being a parent is like being pecked to death by a duck. 2. Raising teenagers is a lot like nailing JELL-O(R) to a tree. 3. Money isn’t everything, but it sure keeps the kids in touch. 4. Your life’s “Golden Age” is the period in your life when your kids are […]
Kids In Hospital
Two little kids are in a hospital, lying on stretchers next to each other, outside the operating room. The first kid leans over and asks, “What are you in here for?” The second kid says, “I’m in here to get my tonsils out and I’m a little nervous.” The first kid says, “You’ve got nothing […]
Warning!
My Dad and I were talking the other night about love and marriage. He told me that he knew as early as their wedding what marriage to my Mom would be like. It seems the minister asked my Mom, “Do you take this man to be your husband.” And she said, “I do.” Then the […]
Terminology
Timmy was a little five year old boy whose Mom loved him very much. Being a worrier, she was concerned about his walking to school when he started Kindergarten. She walked with him the first few days, but he came home one day telling her he did not want her walking him to school every […]
Thought For The Day
When I die I want to go peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather. Not screaming in terror like his passengers!
There’s A Word For It (Still More)
“Doltergeist: A spirit that decides to haunt someplace stupid, such as your septic tank. (David Genser, Arlington) “Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high, such as the famous “Surrender Dorothy” on the Beltway overpass. (Robin D. Grove, Pasadena, Md.) “Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the recipient who doesn’t get it. (Tom […]
Hazardous Materials Data Sheet
Element: Woman Symbol: Wo Discoverer: Adam Atomic Mass: Accepted as 55kg, but known to vary from 45kg to 225kg Occurrence: Found in Large quantities in urban areas with trace elements in outlying regions Physical Properties: Surface normally covered with film of powder and paint. Boils at absolutely nothing, freezes for no apparent reason. Melts if […]
Who’s A Pretty Boy Then?
An old man was sitting on a bench at the mall. A young man walked up to the bench and sat down. He had spiked hair in all different colours: green, red, orange, blue and yellow. The old man just stared. Every time the young man looked over, the old man was staring. The young […]
Logic
Q. If you call a tail a leg, how many legs does a dog have?
Categories
Articles may be reproduced in any medium, without applying for permission
(provided they are unedited, and retain the original author/copyright information - and a reference to this website :-)!
26,756 articles online.
Protected by Akismet, Digital Ninjas and an Ion Cannon. Really.
Blog with WordPress