Humor
More Signs
Sign on a Florida Garbage truck: Satisfaction Guaranteed, or double your garbage back. Another sign on a Southern Florida Garbage truck: Free snow removal.
Finished With God
One day a group of eminent scientists got together and decided that Man had come a long way and no longer needed God. So they picked one scientist to go and tell Him that they were done with Him. The scientist walked up to God and said, “God, we’ve decided that we no longer need […]
Top 10 Reasons God Created Women
10. God worried that Adam would be lost in the Garden of Eden because he wouldn’t ask for directions. 9. God knew that someday Adam would need someone to hand him the TV remote. (Parenthetically, it has been noted that men don’t want to see what’s ON television, they want to see WHAT ELSE is […]
How To Get Into Heaven
An exasperated mother, whose son was always getting into mischief, finally asked him, “How do you expect to get into Heaven?” The boy thought it over and said, “Well, I’ll just run in and out and in and out and keep slamming the door until St. Peter says, ‘For Heaven’s sake, Jimmy, come in or […]
All Her Fault
After the fall in Garden of Eden, Adam was walking with his sons Cain and Abel. They passed by the ruins of the Garden of Eden. One of the boys asked, “What’s that?” Adam replied, “Boys, that’s where your mother ate us out of house and home.”
Ten Public Servants Standing In A Line
Ten public servants standing in a line, One of them was downsized – then there were nine. Nine public servants who must negotiate, One joined the union – then there were eight. Eight public servants thought they were in heaven, ‘Til one of them was redeployed – then there were seven. Seven public servants, their […]
First Grader
Tracy, a first grader, was having trouble adjusting to school. I called her into my office for a chat, confident that my many years of training as a guidance counselor had more than prepared me to handle the situation. “Tracy,” I said, “I want to be your friend. I will never tell your mummy or […]
Dead Cat
When the cat was run over by a car, the mother quickly disposed of the remains before her four-year-old son Billy found out about it. After a few days, Billy finally asked about the cat. “Billy, the cat died,” his mother explained. “But it’s all right. He’s up in heaven with God.” The boy asked,” […]
Deck Of Cards
This is a story about a soldier in the North Africa Campaign in World War II. After heavy fighting, the man returned to camp. The next day being Sunday, the Chaplain had set up church service. The men were asked to take out their Bibles or Prayer Books. The Chaplain noticed one soldier looking at […]
Give A Man A Fish
Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day; teach him to use the Internet, and he won’t bother you for weeks!
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