Humor
Beware On October 28
I usually don’t forward these, but this one is particularly frightening to me…. Don’t go to the bathroom on October 28th. CIA intelligence reports that a major plot is planned for that day. Anyone who takes a poop on the 28th will be bitten on the ass by an alligator. Reports indicate that organised groups […]
Pilot’s Problem
Pilot: “Pilot to tower. I am 300 miles from land, 600 feet over water and running out of fuel. Please instruct!” Tower: “Tower to pilot. Tower to pilot. Repeat after me, ‘Our Father, who art in heaven…'”
Faith
Two nuns were driving along the highway when their car ran out of gas in front of a hospital. They went into the hospital and asked about borrowing something to use for getting gas from the service station to the car. The hospital only had urinals to offer, so the nuns said, “Sure, that will […]
Call Committee
Call Committee Notes The following is a confidential report on several candidates being considered for a pastorate. Adam: Good man but problems with his wife. Also one reference told of how his wife and he enjoy walking nude in the woods. Noah: Former pastorate of 120 years with not even one convert. Prone to unrealistic […]
A Few (Weak) Funnies
A platoon of crack Special Forces soldiers have taken the first steps of reprisal after last month’s incidents in America. The heroic force, composed of Texas A&M Corps of Cadets graduates, have broken into the dog kennel area of the A&M Veterinary Science Building and captured all the Afghans. They reported light casualties. ~~~~~~ “Do […]
Church And Children
When my daughter was about four years old, she still had a hard time grasping the concept of marriage. But anyway, I got out our wedding album, thinking visual images would help, and explained the entire service to her. Once finished, I asked if she had any questions, and she replied, “Oh. I see. Is […]
In The Beginning
In the beginning God created the heavens and the Earth. And the Earth was without form, and void, and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And Satan said, “It doesn’t get any better than this.” And God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light. And God said, “Let the earth ring […]
An Arab And A Fashion Show
Once, Ahmed was visiting a Western town and he was invited to attend a fashion show by a friend. He went, and afterwards he was asked how he liked it. “It’s a complete swindle!” he exclaimed indignantly. “Whatever do you mean?” he was asked. “They show you the women – and then try to sell […]
Encyclopedia For Sale
Genuine advert in New York times For sale by Owner: Complete set of Encyclopaedia Britannica. 45 volumes. Excellent condition. $1,000.00 or the best offer. No longer needed. Got married last weekend. Wife knows ABSOLUTELY everything.
Afghan Terrorists
The Irish army reckon that there are four Afghan terrorists living in Liverpool, England… They’ve found Bin Drinkin, Bin Swearin and Bin Fightin but there’s no sign of Bin Workin…
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