Humor
Occupational Church Hymns
The Dentist’s Hymn:………………Crown Him With Many Crowns The Weatherman’s Hymn………There Shall Be Showers of Blessing The Contractor’s Hymn………….The Church’s One Foundation The Tailor’s Hymn…………………Holy,Holy, Holy The Golfer’s Hymn………………..There is A Green Hill Far Away The Politician’s Hymn……………Standing on the Promises The Optometrist’s Hymn………..Open My Eyes That I Might See The IRS Agent’s Hymn…………..I Surrender All […]
Trivia
Useless trivia It is estimated that Americans will consume 10 million tons of turkey on Thanksgiving Day. Due to turkey’s high sulphur content, Americans will also produce enough gas to fly a fleet of 75 Hindenbergs from L.A. to New York in 24 hours. (Non-smoking flights, of course.) When the University of Nebraska Cornhuskers play […]
Butcher Dance
A guy has spent five years travelling all around the world making a documentary movie on Native dances. At the end of this time, he has every single native dance of every indigenous culture in the world on film. He winds up in Australia, in Alice Springs, so he pops into a pub for a […]
Men And Women
A man was sick and tired of going to work every day while his wife stayed home. He wanted her to see what he went through so he prayed, “Dear Lord, I go to work every day and put in 8 hours while my wife merely stays at home. I want her to know what […]
Quickest Way To York
A man approached a local in a village he was visiting. “What’s the quickest way to York?” The local scratched his head. “Are you walking or driving?” he asked the stranger. “I’m driving.” “That’s the quickest way!”
Brain Cells
A herd of buffalo can move only as fast as the slowest buffalo, and when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps […]
Cat And Mouse
A mouse used to live in a winery, and he would climb up on the rim of a vat and run around and around the edge. One day he finally slipped and fell into the vat full of wine. He couldn’t get out again, so he swam around in the wine and shouted, “Help! Help!” […]
Clock
A well off young man was moving from one street to another, a few streets away. Observing with dismay the care-free way in which the moving crew yanked his cherished antiques about, he was filled with a desire to save from possible damages a tall grandfather’s clock which he prized highly. Taking the clock in […]
Census
A man named Martin was sitting on his porch, when this fella walked up with a pad and pencil in his hand. “What can I do for you?” Martin politely asked. “You selling something?” “No, sir, I’m not. I’m a Census Taker.” “A what?” “A Census Taker. We’re trying to find out how many people […]
I Think I’m…
A girl walked up to the information desk in a hospital and asked to see the “upturn.” “I think, you mean the ‘intern,’ don’t you?” asked the nurse on duty. “Yes,” said the girl. “I want to have a ‘contamination.'” “You mean ‘examination,'” the nurse corrected her. “Well I want to go to the ‘fraternity […]
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