Humor
Instruction And Advice For The Young Bride
on the Conduct and Procedure of the Intimate and Personal Relationships of the Marriage State for the Greater Spiritual Sanctity of this Blessed Sacrament and the Glory of God by Ruth Smythers, beloved wife of The Reverend L.D. Smythers, Pastor of the Arcadian Methodist Church of the Eastern Regional Conference, Published in the year of […]
Shot In Belfast
At 11 p.m. curfew was imposed in Belfast. Everybody had to be off the streets by 9 p.m. However one citizen was shot at 8.45 p.m. ‘Why did you do that?’ the soldier was asked. ‘I know where he lives,’ he replied, ‘and he wouldn’t have made it.’
Talking Clock
A man was showing some friends his apartment. One guest asked "What’s that big brass basin for?" "That’s the talking clock," answered the man. He gave it an ear shattering pound with a hammer. Suddenly, a voice on the other side of the wall screamed, "Knock it off! Don’t you know that it’s 2 a.m., […]
A Recent Study
A recent study was made to find out what days men prefer to have sex? It was found that men preferred to engage in sexual activity on the days that started with "T": Tuesday, Thursday, Thanksgiving, Today, Tomorrow, Thaturday, and Thunday…..
Forgetful
Just a note to say I’m living That I’m not among the dead, Though I’m getting more forgetful And mixed up in the head. I got used to my arthritis, To my dentures I’m resigned. I can manage my bifocals But goodness I miss my mind! For sometimes I can’t remember, When I stand at […]
Moral Lesson
One sunny day at school, little Lucy and her fellow classmates were having a lesson about stories with morals. "Now then" said their teacher very teacherly, "does anyone have a story with a moral they want to tell the rest of the class?" Little Lucy stuck her hand in the air. "Go on then Lucy. […]
Ponderings
1) I STARTED out with nothing….I still have most of it. 2) When did my wild oats turn to prunes and All Bran? 3) I finally got my head together, now my body is falling apart. 4) Funny, I don’t remember being absent minded. 5) All reports are in. Life is now officially unfair. 6) […]
The Creation Of Women
One day, after a near eternity in the Garden of Eden, Adam calls out to God, "Lord, I have a problem." "What’s the problem, Adam?", God replies. "Lord, I know you created me and have provided for me and surrounded me with this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, but I’m just not […]
Brain Transplant
The patient’s family gathered to hear what the specialists had to say. "Things don’t look good." The only chance is a brain transplant. This is an experimental procedure. It might work, but the bad news is that brains are very expensive, and you will have to pay the costs yourselves." "Well, how much does a […]
White-Knuckle Ride
The following article, appeared last month in the Chicago Tribune, headlined "A white-knuckle ride on Air Zimbabwe". "Our flight was delayed, so we settled down to wait. And wait. Three hours later, we were finally told the plane was ready to board. Air Zimbabwe bought many of its planes second-hand from other airlines, and the […]
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