// archives

Humor

This category contains 5241 posts

Disclaimer

‘Let no one who is not eager for truth and peace enter here’ (Plato)

Articles on this site express varying points of view, to encourage mature thinking on serious issues. The assumption is that you will want to study a controversial topic from various angles before you arrive at a conclusion, rather than simply believe what someone told you when you were impressionable! (So some stuff here is ‘hot’. Proceed at your own risk!). See the Statement of Faith for John Mark Ministries' theological stance.

Children’s Humor

1) NUDITY: I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat, ‘Mom, that lady isn’t wearing a seat belt!’ […]

Why did the chicken cross the road?

PAT BUCHANAN To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American. DR. SEUSS Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes! The chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed, I’ve not been told! ERNEST HEMINGWAY To die alone. In the rain. MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR. I envision a […]

How To Call The Police

HOW TO CALL THE POLICE WHEN YOU’RE OLD AND DON’T MOVE FAST ANYMORE. George Phillips of Gold Coast, Australia was going to bed when his wife told him that he’d left the light on in the garden shed, which she could see from the bedroom window. (Does this sound familiar! ) George opened the back […]

This ‘Pachelbel Rant’…

…has been viewed more than 6 million times on YouTube – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JdxkVQy7QLM Enjoy! Rowland

They Walk Among Us!

I couldn’t find my luggage at the airport baggage area. So I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. Then she asked me, “Has your […]

Procession

A man was leaving a local cafe’ with his morning coffee when he noticed a most unusual funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery. A long black hearse was followed by a second long black hearse about 50 feet behind the first one. Behind the second hearse was a solitary man walking a dog on a […]

Conflicting maxims

Look before you leap. He who hesitates is lost. Absence makes the heart grow fonder. Out of sight, out of mind. Haste makes waste. Time waits for no man. You’re never too old to learn. You can’t teach an old dog new tricks. A word to the wise is sufficient. Talk is cheap. It’s better […]

Savvy Estate Planning

Dave was a single guy living at home with his father and working in the family business. When he found out he was going to inherit a fortune when his sickly father died, he decided he needed a wife with which to share his fortune. One evening at an investment meeting he spotted the most […]

Common Sense – some more apparently incompatible maxims

If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again – Don’t beat your head against a brick wall. Absence makes the heart grow fonder – Out of sight, out of mind. Never put off till tomorrow what you can do today – Don’t cross the bridge until you come to it. Two heads are better […]

English Language

Lovers of the English language might enjoy this. It is yet another example of why people learning English have trouble with the language. Learning the nuances of English makes it a difficult language. (But then, that’s probably true of many languages). There is a two-letter word in English that perhaps has more meanings than any […]