Humor
Be Careful What You Wish For
A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him. The waitress asks them for their orders. The man says, “A hamburger, fries and a coke,” and turns to the ostrich, “What’s yours?” “I’ll have the same,” says the ostrich. A short time later the waitress returns with the order “That will be […]
Did you know?
Did you know, diarrhoea is hereditary ? It runs in your Jeans.
Thief in Paris
A thief in Paris planned to steal some paintings from the Louvre. After carefully planning he got past security, stole the paintings and made it safely to his van. However, he was captured only two blocks away when his van ran out of gas. When asked how he could mastermind such a crime and then […]
Diet
An Irishman was terribly overweight, so his doctor put him on a diet. “I want you to eat regularly for 2 days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for 2 weeks. The next time I see you, you should have lost at least 5 pounds.” When the Irishman returned, he shocked the doctor […]
Car
I once knew a man with a wooden car. It had a wooden engine, wooden wheels, wooden windows and it wooden go.
Tater People
Some people never seem motivated to participate, but are just content to watch while others do the work. They are called “Speck Taters”. Some people never do anything to help, but are gifted at finding fault with the way others do the work. They are called “Comment Taters”. Some people are very bossy and like […]
The Working woman’s great household tips
The working womans great household tips Margaret Fulton’s way: Stuff miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice-cream drips. The Working Woman’s way: Just suck the ice-cream out of the bottom of the cone for Pete’s sake. You are probably lying on the couch with your feet up eating it anyway!! […]
Remarkably Insightful Quotes from AFL Footballers
Remarkably Insightful Quotes from AFL Footballers: “I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father.” – (Shane Wakelin) “Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein.” (Mick Malthouse – Collingwood) “I’m going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes.” (Peter Bell […]
Questions and Answers
=========================== A Brunette, a Redhead and a Blonde walk into a bar. For the sake of brevity, each one orders her drink with an abbreviated code word. The Brunette walks up to the bartender and says, “Hey give me an ML.” The bartender nods his head and hands her a Miller Lite. Following her, the […]
Computer Problem – more
I was having trouble with my computer. So I called Harold, the computer guy, to come over. Harold clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem. He gave me a bill for a minimum service call. As he was walking away, I called after him, “So, what was wrong?” He replied, “It was an […]
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