Humor
I hope this doesn’t ruin your day, but ….
Right from his childhood, he was fascinated with tractors. His bedroom walls were covered with pictures of tractors, and all he ever talked about was tractors. This was strange, because he lived in the centre of town and never saw one live and upclose until he was twenty, when he went up country and came […]
Smile
. Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think that is how dogs spend their lives. . I asked my new girlfriend what sort of books she’s interested in and she said: Check books. . The easiest way to make your old car run better, is to check […]
Darwin Awards
A Chronicle of Enterprising Demises http://www.darwinawards.com/
Favourite Darwin Award Story
My favourite Darwin Award story… The 1997 winner was Larry Waters of Los Angeles – one of the few Darwin winners to survive his award-winning accomplishment. Larry’s boyhood dream was to fly. When he graduated from high school, he joined the Air Force in hopes of becoming a pilot. Unfortunately, poor eyesight disqualified him. When […]
The Sex of Cats
The mother and her young son– a toddler– were riding the bus one day. In the middle of their rather quiet ride (back in those days when bus rides tended to be safe and quiet), the toddler yelled (as toddlers will do), “Mommy, is our cat a mommy cat or a daddy cat?” The mother […]
Murphy’s less known rules
Murphy’s less known rules *1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak. *2. He who laughs last, thinks slowest. *3. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine. *4. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don’t. *5. Nothing is foolproof […]
Living
Life would be much better lived backwards You’d start out dead and get it out of the way. Then, wake up in an old peoples home feeling better every day. You get kicked out for being too healthy; go collect your pension, then when you start work, you get a gold watch on your first […]
For those who have sons
For those who have sons. And you also find out interesting things when you have sons, like… 1. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft. house 4 inches deep. 2. If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite. 3. […]
Gordon and the Donkey
A young man named Gordon bought a donkey from an old farmer for £100.00. The farmer agreed to deliver the donkey the next day, but when the farmer drove up he said, “Sorry son, but I have some bad news… the donkey is on my truck, but unfortunately he’s dead.Gordon replied, “Well then, just give […]
Drunk
The husband was not home at his usual hour, and the wife was fuming, as the clock ticked later and later. Finally, about 3:00 AM she heard a noise at the front door, and as she stood at the top of the stairs, there was her husband, drunk as a skunk, trying to navigate the […]
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