Humor
Try This
TODAYS RIDDLE: If you balanced a broom horizontally on your finger, so that your finger was exactly on the broom’s center of gravity, marked that spot and cut the broom in half then you would have a long and a short piece. The long piece being most of the handle and the short piece being […]
Xmas letter to God
There was a man who worked for the Post Office whose job it was to process all the mail that had illegible addresses. One day, a letter came addressed in a shaky handwriting to God. He thought he should open it to see what it was about. The letter read: Dear God, I am an […]
Deep Thoughts For Those Who Take Life Too Seriously
It’s good to review these occasionally. 1. Remember, half the people you know are below average. 2. He who laughs last thinks slowest. 3. OK, so what’s the speed of dark? 4. A day without sunshine is like…night. 5. The early bird may get the worm, but it’s the second mouse that gets the cheese […]
A Comical Look at Aging
I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape, so I got my doctor’s permission to join a fitness club and start exercising. I decided to take an aerobics class for seniors. I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired for an hour. But, by the time I got my leotards […]
Church Dictionary
Church Dictionary :=) AMEN: The only part of a prayer that everyone knows. BULLETIN: Your receipt for attending . CHOIR: A group of people whose singing allows the rest of the Parish to lip-sync. HOLY WATER: A liquid whose chemical formula is H2OLY. HYMN: A song of praise usually sung in a key three octaves […]
Paddy the builder
Paddy was keen to get to work now that he’d arrived in Australia. He loved sport and he had a fair bit of building experience, so he headed for the MCG, hoping to sign on for the Commonwealth Games project. He discovered that he needed to join the union before he could get onto the […]
What’s the worst thing… ?
What’s the worst thing… What’s the worst thing about having a lung transplant? Coughing up someone else’s phlegm.
Proud to be a Baptist?
(This is the kind of story circulating on the ‘Net which reinforces the worst stereotypes about Baptists). ~~~ The lady was a Southern Baptist who attended services and taught Sunday School every week. On one Sunday, an out of town acquaintance, a gentleman, was in the pew right behind her. He noted what a fine […]
Christmas lights
Wednesday, December 07, 2005 DEERFIELD TWP. — Sheriff’s deputies asked the owner who lit up his house with 25,000 Christmas lights synched to music to turn off the display after a traffic accident Tuesday night. Deerfield Twp. resident Carson Williams agreed to shut down his holiday decorations indefinitely. Williams told a Cincinnati television station that […]
Cinderella
Cinderella is now 95 years old. After a fulfilling life with the now dead prince, she happily sits upon her rocking chair, watching the world go by from her front porch, with a cat named Bob for companionship. One sunny afternoon out of nowhere, appeared the fairy godmother. Cinderella said, “Fairy Godmother, what are you […]
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