Humor
A Prayer
A man walking along a California beach was deep in prayer. Suddenly the sky clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, the Lord said, “Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish.” The man said, “Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can […]
Just Like Mother
Manny was almost 29 years old. Most of his friends had already gotten married, and Manny just bounced from one relationship to the next. Finally a friend asked him, “What’s the matter, are you looking for the perfect woman? Are you THAT particular? Can’t you find anyone who suits you?” “No,” Manny replied. “I meet […]
Sunday Service
A minister was planning a wedding at the close of the Sunday morning service. After the benediction he had planned to call the couple down to be married for a brief ceremony before the congregation. For the life of him, he couldn’t think of the names of those who were to be married. “Will those […]
Top Tips For Cheapskates
Top Tips For Cheapskates ~ Old telephone directories make ideal personal address books. Simply cross out the names and addresses of people you don’t know. ~ When reading a book, try tearing out the pages as you read them. This saves the expense of buying a bookmark, and the pages can later be used for […]
Puppy Love
For months Bill had been Lynn’s devoted admirer. Now, at long last, he had collected up sufficient courage to ask her the most momentous of all questions. “There are quite a lot of advantages to being a bachelor,” Bill began, “but there comes a time when one longs for the companionship of another being, a […]
Murphys Laws (military)
Murphys Laws (military): 1. Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than yourself. 2. No battle plan ever survives contact with the enemy. 3. Friendly fire isn’t. 4. The most dangerous thing in the combat zone is an officer with a map. 5. The problem with taking the easy way out is that the enemy […]
Groan :-(
I was born this way. What’s your excuse? Restaurant customer to pianist: “Do you know there’s a little earwig crawling along your bald head?” Pianist: “No, but if you hum the tune I can probably pick it up”.
Children’s wisdom
A Sunday school teacher asked her class, “What was Jesus’ mother’s name?” One child answered, “Mary.” The teacher then asked, “Who knows what Jesus’ father’s name was?” A little kid said, “Verge.” Confused, the teacher asked, “Where did you get that?” The kid said, “Well, you know they are always talking about Verge n’ Mary. […]
Winners from the International Pun competition
🙂 10 winners from the International Pun competition 1. A vulture boards an airplane, carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at him and says, “I’m sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger.” 2. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the other and says “Dam!”. 3. Two Eskimos sitting […]
Murply’s Real Laws
(Don’t know the “professor” that thought these up.) Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don’t have film. He who laughs last, thinks slowest. Honk if you love peace and quiet. Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how it remains so popular? Seen it all, done it all. Can’t remember most of it. I […]
Categories
Articles may be reproduced in any medium, without applying for permission
(provided they are unedited, and retain the original author/copyright information - and a reference to this website :-)!
26,756 articles online.
Protected by Akismet, Digital Ninjas and an Ion Cannon. Really.
Blog with WordPress