Humor
Politically correct Lord’s Prayer
Politically correct Lord ¹s Prayer (NOT FOR THE HUMOUR IMPAIRED!!!) POLITICALLY CORRECT LORD’S PRAYER Our (mis)Concept of Patriarchal Authority, who, it can be said, inhabits the metaphysical sphere, privileged be your signifier. May your social structure achieve dominance. May the enactment of your desire be manifested throughout the physical-metaphysical dichotomy. Empower us this day with the […]
666 Cough Mixture
What Damage Control is Like When the Name of Your Product Is “666” by Deuce of Clubs I was walking the aisles of the local IGA grocery store with my friend Diane when she stopped and silently pointed to an item on the top shelf. It was a yellow box marked ith the mark. You […]
Chocolate maths
CHOCOLATE MATHEMATICS This is pretty neat how it works out.This is cool chocolate math!!!!!!! DON’T CHEAT BY SCROLLING DOWN FIRST! It takes less than a minute……. Work this out as you read.Be sure you don’t read the bottom until you’ve worked it out! This is not one of those waste of time things,it’s fun. 1. […]
Reflection for Election-time
While walking down the street, a Politician is hit by a truck and dies. His soul arrives in heaven, and he is met by St. Peter at the entrance. “Welcome to heaven,” says St. Peter. “Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see such a high official around these parts, […]
Tips for the Clueless
Some Tips for the Clueless (learned the hard way) If you’re bidding on a job for UPS, don’t send your bid by FedEx. If your computer says, “Printer out of Paper,” this problem cannot be resolved by continuously clicking the “OK” button. If you want your refrigerator’s ice maker to work, you need to hook […]
Hymn #365
(~) Hymn #365 A southern minister was completing a temperance sermon. With great emphasis he said, “If I had all the beer in the world, I’d take it and pour it into the river.” With even greater emphasis he said, “And if I had all the wine in the world, I’d take it and pour […]
Laughter For A Saturday
COMPUTER EMAIL RESPONSES When some of you are out of the office, I get little messages from your computers. Here are a few funny ones – 1. Thank you for your e-mail. Your credit card has been charged $5.99 for the first ten words and $1.99 for each additional word in your message. 2. Thank […]
Various stories
(Won’t split your sides, but a couple of gentle chuckles here… ) A woman confided to her girlfriend, “My ex-husband wants to marry me again.” The friend said, “How flattering.” The woman replied, “Not really. I think he’s after the money I married him for.” ———————————————————— A lady goes into the butcher shop and as […]
You and Your Boss – the Subtle Differences
*You and Your Boss: The Subtle Differences* If you take a long time, you’re slow. But if your boss takes a long time, he’s thorough. If you don’t do it, you’re lazy. But if your boss doesn’t do it, he’s too busy. If you make a mistake, you’re an goober. But if your boss makes […]
How do these people survive?
ONE Recently, when I went to McDonald’s I saw on the menu that you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets. I asked for a half dozen nuggets. “We don’t have half dozen nuggets,” said the teenager at the counter. “You don’t?” I replied. “We only have six, nine, or twelve,” […]
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