Humor
Revenge
After 17 years of marriage, a man dumped his wife for a younger woman. The house was in his name and he wanted to remain there with his new love so he asked the wife to move out and then he would buy her another place. The wife agreed to this, but asked that she […]
True Story
TRUE STORY…………………heard on a David Frost interview, who by the way is a very committed Christian. He was at church one morning as an eighteen year old and the minister was preaching on the parable of the ten wise and ten foolish virgins and the oil for their lamps. (If you don’t know the story […]
Never Argue With A Child
A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because, even though, it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a […]
Common Sense
“Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend by the name of Common Sense who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valued lessons […]
Last Shall Be First
A parish priest was being honored at a dinner on the twenty-fifth anniversary of his arrival in that parish. A leading local politician, who was a member of the congregation, was chosen to make the presentation and give a little speech at the dinner, but he was delayed in traffic, so the priest decided to […]
Dismissal
When Art learned that he was being fired, he went to see the head of human resources. “Since I’ve been with the firm for so long,” he said, “I think I deserve at least a letter of recommendation.” The human resources director agreed and said he’d have the letter that next day. The following morning, […]
Headlines
The Pope is visiting DC and President Bush takes him out for an afternoon on the Potomac…sailing on the presidential yacht. They’re admiring the sights when, all of a sudden, the Pope’s hat (zucchetto) blows off his head and out into the water. Secret service guys start to launch a boat, but Bush waves them […]
For A Little Better Knowledge Of Iraq
What is the Iraqi air force motto? I came, I saw, Iran. Have you heard about the new Iraqi air force exercise program? Each morning you raise your hands above your head and leave them there. What’s the five-day forecast for Baghdad? Two days. What do Miss Muffet and Saddam Hussein have in common? They […]
A A A D D
Recently, I was diagnosed with AAADD. Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder. This is how it manifests itself: I decided to wash my car. As I start toward the garage, I spotted the mail on the hall table. I should go through the mail before I wash the car. I lay the car keys on the […]
Tourists
A lady on her first visit to Yellowstone National Park said to her guide, “Look at all those big rocks. Wherever did they come from?” “The glaciers brought them down,” said the guide. “But where are the glaciers?” The lady asked. “The glaciers,” said the guide in a weary voice, “have gone back for more […]
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