Humor
Tips
What Is The Usual Tip? ====================== After the college boy delivered the pizza to Amanpreet’s trailer house, Amanpreet asked,”What is the usual tip?” “Well,” replied the youth, “This is my first trip here, but the other guys say if I get a quarter out of you, I’ll be doing great.” “Is that so?” snorted Preet. […]
Parachute
The skydiving instructor was going through the question and answer period with his new students when one of them asked the usual question always asked, “If our chute doesn’t open; and the reserve doesn’t open, how long do we have till we hit the ground?” The jump instructor answered, “The rest of your life.”
Duck Hunting
============ A big-city, California, lawyer went duck hunting in rural Texas. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer’s field on the other side of a fence. As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing. The litigator […]
Driving Offences
A man who is driving a car is stopped by a police officer. The following exchange takes place…. The man says, “What’s the problem officer?” Officer: “You were going at least 75 in a 55 zone.” Man: “No sir, I was going 65.” Wife: “Oh, Harry. You were going 80.” (The man gives his wife […]
Stress Relievers
================ 1. Jam miniature marshmallows up your nose and sneeze them out. See how many you can do at a time. 2. Use your Mastercard to pay your Visa and vice-versa. 3. Pop some popcorn without putting the lid on. 4. When someone says “Have a nice day,” tell them you have other plans. 5. […]
Reference
“To Whom It May Concern: “Bob Smith, my assistant programmer, can always be found hard at work in his cubicle. Bob works independently, without wasting company time talking to colleagues. Bob never thinks twice about assisting fellow employees, and he always finishes given assignments on time. Often he takes extended measures to complete his work, […]
Madame President
The year is 2012 and the United States of America has recently elected Susan Vineberg as both the first woman as well as the first Jewish President. The President-elect calls up her mother on January 10th. “So ma, I assume you will be coming to my inauguration?” “I don’t think so. It’s a ten hour […]
The Smile Virus !!
Smiling is infectious, you catch it like the flu, When someone smiled at me today, I started smiling too. I passed around the corner and someone saw my grin When he smiled I realised I’d passed it on to him. I thought about that smile then I realised its worth, A single smile, just like […]
Pearly Gates
A guy arrives at the pearly gates, waiting to be admitted. St. Peter is reading through the Big Book to see if the guy’s name is written in it. After several minutes, St. Peter closes the book, furrows his brow, and says, “I’m sorry, I don’t see your name written in the Book.” “How current […]
Theological Story
As they came to Caesarea Philippi, Jesus asked his disciples, saying “Whom do men say that I am?” And they answered, some say John the Baptist, and others Elias, or one of the prophets. And he saith unto them, “But whom say ye that I am?” And Peter answered him: “You are the eschatological manifestation […]
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